Fri, 09 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/ PostNuke Powered Site en-us http://www.claudepate.com/images/logo.gif http://www.claudepate.com/ admin@claudepate.com http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1004 THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE:...with THE BOX TOPS!  Before tackling the power pop of Big Star and becoming an icon of proto-indie rock, Alex Chilton cut his musical chops as the singer for this blue-eyed soul group out of Memphis.  Best known for their take on Wayne Carson Thompson's "The Letter," which ruled the charts in 1967, the follow-up, "Neon Rainbow," would get as high as No. 24 later that year. "Cry Like a Baby" was a major hit in 1968.  They hit the Mike Douglas Show for a twofer of "Turn On a Dream" and "Soul Deep," the latter being their final Top 40 hit.  The group became increasingly disenchanted with the managers, lawyers, and promoters that exploited them; the band would dissolve by February 1970.ALL SONGS CONSIDERED show cases "great music from bands we'd never heard of before," including Bowerbirds, Amber Rubarth and Try Me Bicycle.THE LAST SHADOW PUPPETS, a/k/a Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys and Miles Kane of The Rascals, did a chat and stripped-down mini-set for the World Cafe you can stream on demand via NPR. You can stream their full album of symphonic, '60s-tinged pop through the weekend via Spinner.THE CAVE SINGERS vocalist Pete Quirk talks to DC's Express about switching to neo-folk from the post-grunge sound of the now-defunct Pretty Girls Make Graves.EL PERRO del MAR: Sarah Assbring talks to Vancouver's Straight about how mortality affected the recording of the just-released From the Valley to the Stars.THE TING TINGS: "Shut Up and Let Me Go" is the track of the new iPod ad, which is a good excuse to relink the new single, "That's Not My Name."PAUL WELLER turns 50 this month. The Telegraph surveys three distinct chapters of his life in music.VAMPIRE WEEKEND also gets a profile in the Telegraph, talking about all of the band's perceived influences.THE KILLS get a profile in Metro Toronto and a rave live review from Frank Yang at Chromewaves, with plenty of A/V linkage.CUTOUT BIN: From Marilyn Monroe to Richard Hell, from Smoosh to The Supremes, from the Woodentops to Wilco, Elvis Costello and the Starland Vocal Band, this Friday's fortuitous finds can be jukeboxed or streamed individually on the Pate page at the ol' HM.SPEED RACER, as you'll see in the next blurb, is getting mostly bad reviews, with some critics really hating it.  I completely understand why, but cannot bring myself to hate it, and not just because I love the original cartoon.  The script is a disaster.  It is on the one hand over-plotted, with too many bit characters whose relevance is never fully explained.  On the other hand, it often fails in basic exposition in ways that distance you from the movie.  A number of the bad reviews find the Wachowskis' "car-fu" so unrealistic that they never feel as though the characters are in real peril.  I did not have as much of an issue with that as with the failure of the script to establish a particular level of cartoon action, so that you know what the rules of "car-fu" are.  Thus, the race that works best is the road rally in the second act, because we instinctively understand the more realistic environment better.  The track races which bookend the film are less satisfying because their exposition is non-existent, leaving the viewer clueless as to the relative import of the twists, turns, obstacles, etc.  The Wachowskis would even have done well to take the remixes of the Speed Racer music that plays over the end credits and bring them into the movie itself; the limited animation of the 60s original required that the tension and drama be carried in no small part by that music.  All of that being said, the movie is a psychedelic visual feast.  There is plenty of racing action for the kids, and some solid family messages for a family movie. I found myself leaving the theater liking it, despite its major flaws.  But I would have loved to love it.NOW SHOWING: In addition to Speed Racer, which is currently scoring 35 percent on the ol' Tomatometer, this weekend's other wide release is the rom-com What Happens in Vegas, which is scoring 42 percent. It is probably another big weekend for Iron Man, methinks.LIV TYLER & ROYSTON LANGDON have decided to separate, her rep confirms to People magazine.  Wasn't my fault.MINNIE DRIVER denies that musician Craig Zolezzi is the father of her unborn child, adding that he is English and "sort of in the same business." And she's got a countrified music albuum coming out, with cameos from Ryan Adams and his band The Cardinals, as well as Liz Phair.BRITNEY SPEARS: Part of her return appearance from CBS's How I Met Your Mother is already online. The ever-reliable Star magazine claims that the pop wreck and Fed-Ex are having weekly steamy phone sex sessions, which if true disproves the existence of God.JEN & JOHN: After filming for three months in Miami, Jennifer Aniston has big plans for the wrap party of Marley & Me, including a special performance by her new man, John Mayer.  Plus, we have a lovely new profanity-laden video, "Makin' Music with John Mayer," courtesy of FunnyOrDie.LINDSAY LOHAN has a new song, "Bossy," posted online. She really needs to get movie work. Really.KATHERINE HEIGL would like to leave Grey's Anatomy for more movie works, but she's under contarct to the ABC show.INDIANA JONES and the KINGDOM OF UH-OH: An early review at Ain't-It-Cool-News (w/spoilers) is not good.THE SPIRIT: Will Eisner's 1940's classic comic is headed for the big screen, thanks to Frank Miller (The Dark Knight Returns, Sin City, 300).  Trailer at the link (current temp score from The Untouchables).JESSICA ALBA competes in a staring contest to boost boyfriend Cash Warren's Internet startup, iBeatYou.  Video at the link.GLOBAL WARMING may cause Greenland to gain independence from Denmark.IRAN & IRAQ: Iran has protested to Iraq over reports that Baghdad had backed the United Arab Emirates' claim to three islands in the Gulf, the foreign ministry said on Wednesday.IRAQ: Iraqi soldiers for the first time warned residents in Sadr City to leave their houses, signaling a new push by the US-backed forces against Shiite extremists who have been waging street battles for seven weeks.  The leader of al-Qaeda in Iraq, Abu Ayyub al-Masri, was arrested in the northern city of Mosul, the Iraqi Defense Ministry spokesman said Thursday. News of the arrest was also reported by Iraqi state television, but the US military has not confirmed the report. I'll believe it when I see it.  Bill Roggio has  background on al-Masri.BABY HEDGEHOGS: Awww...BABY GIRAFFE: Awww...A MISSING CAT in Cornwall, England, is spotted by a woman nearly 4000 miles away in America, via webcam.THE SQUIRREL THREAT: Militant squirrels are secretly behind the kamikaze iguana who took down the electrical grid in Taramac and Pompano Beach, FL. Fri, 09 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1003 R.E.M. has a new video for "Hollow Man," the second from their Accelerate album.GANG OF TWO:  The full Gang of Four reunion is short-lived.  Bassist Dave Allen and drummer Hugo Burnham are moving on, although singer Jon King and guitar-player Andy Gill will continue, focusing on writing and recording new music as Gang of Four.BLACK KIDS stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via MPR.THE REPLACEMENTS & HUSKER DU:  Check out a vintage Q magazine profile of the Mpls scene from 1987 in Wolfgang's Vault.LOU REED & LAURIE ANDERSON spent ten bucks on their wedding, which was performed by NPR host and bluegrass musician Nick Forster.SAD KERMIT covers Elliot Smith's "Needle in the Hay," with spoilers for those who have yet to see the Royal Tenenbaums.TOKYO POLICE CLUB stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via MPR.THE VASELINES are rumored to be reuniting for the SubPop 20th Anniversary party.PRINCE is putting out a photo book chronicling Prince's 21 consecutive sold-out shows at London's O2 Arena last year, including a CD culled from the intimate, small-venue gigs the artist played after-hours.SIGNS YOU MAY BE A HIPSTER, courtesy of the Morning News.ASHLEE SIMPSON & PETE WENTZ are set to have a shotgun wedding next weekend in California?AMY WINEHOUSE was arrested and held in custody Monday for possession of Class A drugs. The charges were brought as a result of a damaging video of the star smoking crack cocaine and talking about taking Valium while appearing dazed and disorientated, which was made public in January this year.BRADGELINA: Jolie is set to birth twin daughters, according to the ever-relaible Star magazine.MARIAH CAREY & NICK CANNON: Their wedding photo is the new cover of People magazine.MADONNA is desperately seeking publicity with another onstage girl-on-girl kiss in France.  At this point, wouldn't Madge get more pub kissing a dude?THE DARK KNIGHT: Having mentioned that Aaron Eckhart leaked a big spolier, I note that a picture has surfaced on the Internet.  Plus, rumors are already rolling on the story for Batman 3.GO, SPEED... UH-OH: The Wachowski's adaptation of the Japanese cartoon of the '60s and '70s -- has been tracking unimpressively in prerelease surveys. At present, "Speed Racer" appears on track to gross 25-35 million this weekend, though family moviegoers are notoriously tough to track before openings.  Fortunately for Warner Bros, most of its splashy effects were done with relatively affordable green-screen technology.ELLEN PAGE set to play one of English literature's most famous characters, the eponymous heroine of Charlotte Bronte's "Jane Eyre."ROBIN WILLIAMS and his estranged wife Marsha Garces Williams have pledged to be "honest, cooperative and respectful" during their divorce proceedings, according to court papers released Tuesday.CSI PALM BEACH: Gary Dourdan has been charged with three felonies for possession of a controlled substance -- one charge each for heroin, cocaine and ecstasy.ISABELLA ROSSELLINI plays bugs and snails in a series of short films on how small creatures get down, commissioned by the Sundance Channel.  For one clip, she hired her son and his friends to play the male bees.LEBANON's long-simmering political crisis erupted into gunfire and explosions Wednesday when a labor strike devolved into clashes between rival Hezbollah and government supporters. Most Sunnis back Prime Minister Fuad Saniora's government, while Shiites generally support the opposition led by Hezbollah, which the U.S. has labeled a terrorist organization. Lebanon's government has declared illegal an extensive telecommunications network run by Hezbollah. Tension is also high after the chief of security at Beirut airport was removed for alleged Hezbollah sympathies.  Helzbollah has besieged the Beirut airport and no longer has good relations with the Lebanese army.IRAN: Two leading clerics declare that Pres. Ahmadinejad would be better off concentrating on Iran's social problems -- most notably its double-digit inflation -- than indulging his wacky religious beliefs. Nine million Iranians cannot read or write out of a population of at least 71.5 million, a newspaper reported Wednesday. Israel now believes the Islamic Republic will master centrifuge technology and be able to begin enriching uranium on a military scale this year, according to The Jerusalem Post. IRAN & IRAQ: A Sunni fundamentalist from Kuwait who has been linked by the UN and the US to al-Qaeda said in an interview published Wednesday that Iran is supporting Sunni Arab insurgents fighting American troops in Iraq. The Iraqi government is preparing its case on Iran's involvement in the Shia insurgency. "It's a bit disingenuous to believe such quantities of up-to-date weapons manufactured this year, last year, can flow into the country without the knowledge of the Iranian government," said Iraq's ambassador to the UN. An Iraqi Sunni delegation on a visit to Cairo on Wednesday urged Arab countries to act against what it called the "Iranian occupation" of Iraq. Former Iranian president Mohamad Khatami was under fire from hardliners on Monday after comments interpreted as accusing the country's clerical leaders of supporting insurgents in the Middle East.IRAQ:  A proposed election law could hurt the political movement of Moqtada al-Sadr -- whose Mahdi Army militia followers have been battling US and Iraqi troops in Baghdad's Sadr City.SHARK SURFIN': Let's go to the video!THE SQUIRREL THREAT: Retirees on the Riverside estate in Grantham, England, went without television for two months - thanks to rogue squirrels. The squirrel attack knocked out the television signal in at least 15 flats on the estate. Repairs to the cable were not been possible while the squirrels continued to wreak havoc in the area.A PITBULL turns up in the engine compartment of a pickup truck in Vacaville, Calif.THREE ELK die in a tragic zoo opening incident.MINNESOTEAN SEA MONSTER is so hard to track that a 50 grand reward is out for proof it exists. Thu, 08 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1002 TOM WAITS announced the dates for his upcoming "Glitter and Doom" tour. Pehdtskajmba!LOU REED played DC's 9:30 Club April 22, but you can stream the gig now via NPR. (Steve Hunter joins on gtr.)MAN MAN gets a segment on All Things Considered, plus streaming music tracks and live video. "Everybody thinks that they're a joke band, but they're really not," says Jessica Suarez, a music writer for Pitchfork and Fader. "If you listen to their lyrics, they're super-emotional lyrics."SHE & HIM talk to Alex Cohen on NPR's Day to Day, with a streaming track.BEULAH frontman Miles Kurosky has posted a new song from his upcoming solo album at HisSpace.CURTIS MAYFIELD is the focus of a new DVD that gets a rave write-up from Robert Hilburn in the L.A. Times.THE REPUBLIC TIGERS show you "Buildings & Mountains" from their new album, which is streaming in full via Spinner this week.BON IVER:  Justin Vernon talks to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel and Drowned in Sound about his raved-about debut, For Emma, Forever Ago, recorded during a solitary stint of over three months in his father's log cabin, outside Eau Claire, Wisconsin.THE POLICE will cap their reunion tour with a final concert this summer in NYC, where they started their first US tour 30 years ago. They said they would donate a million dollars to a city program that aims to plant one million trees by 2017.IT MIGHT GET LOUD:  Davis Guggenheim has completed filming on a documentary that will look at the story of the electric guitar from the point of view of three significant rock musicians: the Edge, Jimmy Page and Jack White.PETE DOHERTY has rescheduled his headline solo show at the London Royal Albert Hall for July 12.BRITNEY SPEARS has gained more visitation of her two young sons, three days supervised visitation a week, significantly more face time than she gets now.JOHN MAYER spoke to Entertainment Tonight about the recent tabloid photos of him with Jennifer Aniston in Miami.AMY WINEHOUSE's junkie husband has reportedly sworn his undying love to a secret mistress - and vowed to run away with her and a chunk of the singer's £10million fortune.PAM ANDERSON sold off the contents of one of her LA homes -- including furniture, Baywatch memorabilia, books, clothing, shoes, and even her used underwear -- over the weekend as she 'spring cleaned' her life following the end of her third marriage.LINDSAY LOHAN apparently left a private birthday party on Jan. 26 wearing an 11K blond mink coat belonging to a Columbia co-ed.IRON MAN:  The Atlantic's Ross Douthat despairs of the movie's success because it means more superhero movies (I would say that's fine if they are good movies).  Hitsville's Bill Wyman notes the movie's records are inflated -- as is the overall box office.  The New Yorker's David Denby wonders if Robert Downey Jr.'s Tony Stark has the emotional depth to justify an Iron Man franchise (A: Yes, if you know the comic book).  The L.A. Times gives "Ten reasons Jeff Bridges is underrated," but there are eleven, which is one more.UMA THURMAN:  Jack Jordan -- Thurman's stalker -- has been found guilty of fourth-degree stalking and one count of second degree aggravated harassment by a Manhattan jury.  The aggravated harassment conviction can mean up to a year behind bars.THE BATMOBILE is for sale.  I would prefer the Tumbler model, but if someone wants to get the old school version for me, I would still be pretty happy.SEINFELD: Ten years later, Newsweek's Marc Peyser questions whether the show should be considered a classic, let alone the best sitcom ever.PULP FICTION fans may want to read Bridget Johnson's account of a screening and panel discussion with Quentin Tarantino.STAR TREK:  J.J. Abrams talks to the AP about why a self-professed "Star Wars" kid is directing the "Star Trek" reboot.  William Shatner believes as long as he keeps having fun, it will be impossible for him to die -- which is a good excuse to roll the "He's dead, Jim" video.GLOBAL WARMING: The Daily Mail charts some of the leading celebrity ecological hypocrites.IRAN & IRAQ: As American strikes on Shiite fighters in Baghdad have widened, Iran has suspended talks with the US on Iraqi security, with the Iranian Foreign Ministry on Monday citing the continued offensive as the reason. The Americans believe that Iran is supplying weapons and training to Shiite militias in Iraq, but the Iranians have denied that they are interfering. The Iraqis are forming a committee with experts from Interior and Defense Ministries to look into the allegations against Iran. Elements of the Mahdi Army seem to be tellling the L.A. Times that they are getting their weapons from Iran.IRAQ: The US military says 3500 soldiers sent to Iraq last summer as part of the "surge" will soon be leaving. Suspected AQI operatives kidnapped a pro-US tribal chief and family members in a village north of Baghdad on Tuesday. Iraqi security forces found documents purported to belong to AQI in Diyala province, which include names of 6000 alleged suicide bombers in Iraq, an official newspaper said Tuesday. The official spokesman for the Iraqi government said nominees submitted for ministerial posts by the Sunni Iraqi Accordance Front were "unqualified." The Christian Science Monitor reports on people moving back into the now-walled neighborhoods in Baghdad.  The CSM likes to do this story every few months.  Of course, once an area becaomes safe, like Ramadi, the walls can get dismantled.GOOSE ATTACK: Let's go to the video. What say you, Police Chief Brody? (nsfw)THE BIRDS: When the Andersons walked into their house after a neighborhood barbecue, they never expected to find 200 birds inside.CAMEL punched on a dare at Six Flags Discovery Kingdom.COWS shut down the M2 Motorway, one of the main arterial routes in and out of Belfast.CROCODILE takes boy's arm, saves his soul. Wed, 07 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1001 RADIOHEAD has joined with MTV to make video of "All I Need" to raise awareness of human trafficking.NEW RELEASES: The Last Shadow Puppets, the Submarines, Matmos, Republic Tigers, Neil Freakin' Diamond and more are streaming in full this week via Spinner.  The Long Blondes release Couples.  The Morning Benders release Talking Through Tin Cans.  Elvis Costello releases Momofuku digitally, after dropping the vinyl a few weeks back. And Nine Inch Nails is giving away downloads of its album.BECK may surprise us with a new album in the next 4-6 weeks, with help from people like Danger Mouse and Cat Power.TIM FITE does the four free songs thing for Daytrotter, including two from the forthcoming Fair Ain't Fair album.THE REPLACEMENTS:  There's a crash course in their early works at North by Northwestern, for all you youngsters out there. (Thx, LHB.)THE HEAVY perform "Oh, No!" and "Sixteen" (which owes a bit to "I Put A Spell On You") live on The Current's stage at SxSW for your Twofer Tuesday.ELBOW is losing money on its US tour, due to the US dollar's dropping exchange rate against the British pound.  Shoulda asked to be paid in Euros in the contracts...LES SAVY FAV: Tim Harrington talks to Pitchfork about the new digital-only live album, After the Balls Drop, and the band's last studio effort, Let's Stay Friends.DeVotchKa sousaphonist-bassist Jeanie Schroder talks to Straight about trying to build on the visibility of the Little Miss Sunshine soundtrack with A Mad & Faithful Telling: "You don't want to get all this attention and then make something that sucks..."BAD SONGS BY GOOD BANDS:  Count 'em down at Spinner.SCARLETT JOHANSSON & RYAN REYNOLDS, who have been dating since Spring 2007, are engaged. She turned up at the Costume Institute Gala sans Reynolds but flashing a fabulous rock on her left hand. Congrats to them.ANGELA KINSEY of The Office and her TV writer  husband have welcomed a baby daughter, named Isabel. Congrats to them, too.DENNIS RODMAN entered an outpatient rehab facility Monday, just days after he was arrested on suspicion of felony domestic battery.  Good luck to him.PEACHES GELDOF, Sir Bob's 19-year-old daughter, was caught on video buying drugs from Amy Winehouse's alleged dealer.  No congrats for her!DINA LOHAN, Lindsay's mom, will be honored by Mingling Moms as one of Long Island's Top 20 Moms, the organization announced Monday.  Yes, really.TOM CRUISE says his couch-jumping on "The Oprah Winfrey Show" seemed to set off a "confluence" of bad publicity for him, but he's not sure he would take it back.  Video at the link.THE A-LIST is having trouble packing multiplexes based on star wattage alone.  It's increasingly clear that other elements, from established franchises to marketable concepts to such brand-name creators as Tyler Perry and Judd Apatow, either give actors a necessary boost or entirely replace them as the draw for moviegoers.  The Hollywood Reporter investigates, and presents nifty charts.HARRISON FORD talks to the L.A. Times about returning to the iconic role of Indiana Jones after an 18-year hiatus.IRON MAN 2 is set for April 2010, to be followed by Thor, Captain America and The Avengers.  BONUS:  Dvice gets you started on building your own Iron Man armor.GO, SPEED... UH-OH: The early reviews are not good.  Ouch.THE DARK KNIGHT: Here's a nice non-bootleg version of the third trailer currently running before Iron Man in theaters.  ALSO: Aaron Eckhart gives the L.A. Times a spoiler!IRAN said on Monday it would not consider any incentives offered by world powers that violated its right to nuclear technology, ruling out a precondition to halt atomic work the West believes is aimed at making bombs.  Moreover, the Islamic theocracy will not submit to extensive nuclear inspections while Israel stays outside the global treaty to curb the spread of atomic weapons.IRAN & IRAQ: Former president Mohammad Khatami has said exporting violence to other countries is "treason" against Islam and Iran's 1979 revolution, an apparent accusation that the country's hard-line rulers are engineering unrest abroad.  Hezbollah has been training Iraqi militia fighters at a camp near Tehran, according to US interrogation reports supplied to the Iraqi government. The Iraqi Minister of Defense Abdel-Qadir al-Ubaydi said a rocket exportable only by states has been found in Basra, a newspaper said Monday, while an Iraqi government spokesman sent mixed messages on Iran's role in his country.IRAQ: The US is moving south, planning to upgrade facilities at Camp Delta and the Al Kut Air Base, which is about 140 miles southeast of Baghdad and just 35 miles from the Iranian border.  Milblogger Michael Yon writes in the NYDN that confronting the Shia militias is the storm before the calm.A MONKEY on a GOAT on a TIGHTROPE: Let's go to the video.FERAL PARROTS surviving in Brooklyn.COMET the GOLDFISH has been trained to play soccer and basketball, and to dance the limbo.A CROCODILE has been reported living in a rubbish-strewn local lake next to a supermarket in Swansea, England.BEAR breaks its paw after dozing off and falling out of a tree in Orlando, FL.  Apparently not a Country Bear. And yes, the bear is going to be alright, Little Tommy. Pics and video at the link. Tue, 06 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1000 WE ARE SCIENTISTS stage a Western of sorts in the video for "Chick Lit," which may be the catchiest thing they've ever done.TEGAN & SARA bring some of the banter featured here on Friday to a discussion of their current musicl faves in the New York Times.THE WATSON TWINS stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via MPR.STEPHEN MALKMUS talks to Canada's National Post about the differences between Real Emotional Trash and his previous albums.ADELE: The 19-year-old British soul singer-songwriter has a chat and mini-set in audio or video at The Interface.DESPERATELY SEEKING PAUL McCARTNEY: The upcoming indie mockumentary on a woman who turned down Paul's marriage proposal now has a trailer online. (Thx, Bena Warren.)ISOBEL CAMPBELL talks to the Independent and The Scotsman about working again with Mark Lanegan (Screaming Trees, Queens of the Stone Age) on their second LP, Sunday at Devil Dirt: "He'll be jolly one day and then he'll go back to being quieter than ever and it's as if you're not even there. I try not to take it personally but it's not always easy. For me, it's actually quite masochistic. Sometimes you want to put a whoopee cushion on his chair or blow a big raspberry at him - which I actually do sometimes!"JAMES BROWN: A DNA test reportedly confirms that the late Godfather of Soul fathered the son of a woman who claims to be the singer's widow.EL PERRO del MAR: Sarah Assbring talks to Pitchfork about her self-recorded and self-produced new album, From the Valley.AMY WINEHOUSE is unfit to work on any new music projects, according to her producer and friend Mark Ronson.  The pair were supposed to be recording the theme tune for the next James Bond film, Quantum of Solace.IRON MAN RULES the weekend box office taking in about 100 million in the US and 200 million worldwide.  That is far more than the 70 million consensus prediction for the US.  Iron Man enjoyed the 10th-best three-day opening ever, the 10th movie premiere to exceed $100 mil, and the No. 2 debut of all time for a non-sequel (behind only Spider-Man's $114.8 mil). Robert Downey Jr. has never fronted a movie that grossed 100 mil during its entire run, let alone in one weekend.  It has recouped its production budget of 150 million and is well on its way to recouping estimated total costs of 225 million.  It did all this despite failing to appeal to what industry insiders call ''all four quadrants'' - that is, its audience was not evenly divided between men and women, young people and older folks (a whopping 71 percent of ticket buyers were men and 64 percent were over the age of 25). Speed Racer may face his greatest foe in the Golden Avenger when he rolls into theaters this Friday.  The weekend's other wide release, Made of Honor, made 15 million.  Iron Man's repulsor rays were felt all down the rest of the Top Ten.R. KELLY: A woman is set to testify at the R&B superstar's upcoming child pornography trial that she had a three-way sexual encounter with Kelly and the allegedly underage girl shown in the video at the heart of the case.COURTNEY LOVE made a 3am trip to the emergency unit of LA's Cedars Sinai hospital complaining of laryngitis.  Moments after being released, she was off to get some smokes.  Hmmm...JAMIE LYNN SPEARS, Britney's 17-year-old knocked-up sister, was feted with an intimate baby shower in Kentwood, LA.  The pop wreck was in attendance.ROB LOWE:  It's a small world -- Laura Boyce, the second nanny accusing Rob Lowe and his wife of sexual harassment, also babysits for reality TV star Shanna Moakler.  Lowe's wife denounces the allegations against them as "lies meant to embarrass and humiliate."KATE HUDSON apparently has herself a stalker.TOM-KAT UPDATE:  This time, Oprah visit's Cruise's couch.  The Big O has a preview at her website.NICOLE KIDMAN is reportedly set to play Dusty Springfield in a new biopic of the singer's life.DREW BARRYMORE & JUSTIN LONG are secretly planning to marry in the Caribbean later this year, according to a source who overheard the couple planning the ceremony over a recent lunch date.CSI star Gary Dourdan has issued a statement to Access Hollywood over his arrest for drug possession in Palm Springs last weekend, claiming the substances found in the car did not belong to him.LINDSAY LOHAN began shooting her spot on ABC's Ugly Betty on Saturday.PATRICK SWAYZE, who is battling pancreatic cancer, looked just a shadow of his former self as he went shopping this week.ELISHA CUTHBERT has scored herself a new hockey player boyfriend, Calgary Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf.GLOBAL WARMING is blamed for a rise in shark attacks off the East Coast.  Just another thing to add to the list.IRAN & IRAQ: An Iraqi delegation in Iran has confronted Iranian security officials with evidence that Tehran is providing support for Shi'ite militias battling Iraqi government forces, an Iraqi official said on Friday. "They presented a list of names, training camps and cells linked to Iran," Haidar al-Ibadi, a member of Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki's Dawa party, told Reuters.  Though they admit nothing, Iran backs efforts by the Iraqi government to disarm militiamen, an Iranian news agency said on Sunday.  Maybe it's just happy talk, or maybe Iran is concerned about US military planning for a "surgical strike" against an insurgent training camp inside Iran if Republican Guards continue with attempts to destabilize Iraq.IRAQ: The US Army targeted and destroyed a Special Groups command and control center in a Guided Multiple Launch Rocket System strike in Sadr City Saturday morning.  Bill Ardolino is back in Iraq, reporting that the fighting in Sadr City is causing the locals to turn against Moqtada al-Sadr's Mahdi Army in the Rusafa neighborhood in Baghdad.AN ANARCTIC FUR SEAL is observed trying to have sex with a king penguin.  I blame global warming.THE SQUIRREL THREAT: Their rat allies shut down internet service for Qwest customers through Cochise County, AZ, while they secretly develop their own droid army.A DOG was framed in a human castration case, but justice has prevailed in France.A NANNY pulled a 2-year-old girl from the jaws of a coyote when the animal attacked the toddler and tried to carry her away in its mouth.140 COWS stare unamazed as they are rescued by a military barge from flooding that has struck New Brunswick's capital region. Pic at the link. Mon, 05 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=998 THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE:photo by optionthis... with TEGAN & SARA!  They have been called "indie music's answer to Laurel and Hardy," and their onstage banter is here among their performances at the Coachella festival.  The correct sequence, afaik, is: "Dark Come Soon," "The Con," "Burn Your Life Down," "Floorplan," "Speak Slow," "I Bet It Stung," "Fix You Up," "So Jealous," "Nineteen," "Back In Your Head," "Walking With A Ghost," "Hop A Plane" and "Living Room." BONUS: It turns out that there is a Tegan & Sara banter blog, with plenty of embedded video.COACHELLA: In addition to Tegan & Sara, Largehearted Boy is collecting downloads and streams of acts that played the festival, including Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings, Roger Waters, DeVotchKa, MGMT, the Raconteurs and more...OTTER, including Friend of Pate Scott Jasper, is playing the Bali Satay House in Ames, IA, tonight at 9:00 p.m. Be there or be square.  Guys wear ties, gals wear dresses. Yes, I'm kidding about the last bit.OF MONTREAL's Kevin Barnes is doing a solo show in Toronto, so he spoke to Eye Weekly, in part about how he always identified with feminine male artists like David Bowie, Lou Reed, Marc Bolan and Prince: "I love how they transcend gender expectations without sinking too far into campiness - it's a fine line for sure..."ELBOW stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via MPR.  Frontman Guy Garvey talks to the NYDN about the debt the band owes Radiohead and the dynamics of songwriting.  He discusses a variety of subjects -- politics, the business, self-promotion, etc. --at DCist with Kyle Gustafson, who blogs at Information Leafblower.THE MYSTERY JETS have a new video for "Two Doors Down" that has a classic cheesy MTV feel to it.  I previously linked the video for "Young Love."WILCO bassist John Stirratt seems to be doing the press in the current leg of their tour, praising the versatility of the current lineup and hinting about their next record in the Winnipeg Sun, while he talks about the changing nature of the biz and the band's five-night residence in Chicago with the Colorado Springs Independent. (Thx, LHB.)THE REPLACEMENTS' widely circulated 1985 bootleg, Simply Unacceptable, is posted at PopHeadwound.  You can also stream it for now via the ol' HM.OKKERVIL RIVER hit WOXY's lounge last week; you can watch the mini-set and download the audio via The Futurist.CUTOUT BIN: From the Kingsmen to ELO, from Big Mama Thornton to The Babys, from the Ting Tings to the Sex Pistols, The Replcements, The Feelies, Liz Phair and Pavement, this Friday's fortuitous finds can be jukeboxed or streamed individually on the Pate page at the ol' HM.IRON MAN took a very long and winding road through development Hell to get to your cineplex today.  And it is almost always the better for it.  The original comic sprung from the backdrop of Vietnam; current events make this update seem as ripped from the headlines as an episode of Law & Order -- if Jerry Orbach had worn wicked cool armor.  The script -- which swifty and sharply mixes action and exposition from the outset -- attacks the arms business, though anyone familiar with the comic book's Obidiah Stane stiryline could have seen this variant coming.  The delay also put the project in the hands of director Jon Favreau (who even turns up in Vegas, baby), who does one of the smartest things a director can do -- cast his picture well.  Word is the suits would have preferred someone younger or more bankable than the rehabbed Robert Downey, Jr., but fans immediately saw him as perfect to play the excessive playboy-genius turned redemption-seeking hero Tony Stark -- and Downey does not disappoint.  Favreau lets Downey have his head, and his supporting cast -- primarily Gwyneth Paltrow, Terence Howard and Jeff Bridges -- each bring their game to meet his.  Indeed, while there is enough CGI action to keep the kids' attention, adults may find themselves wishing for more of the character-driven scenes. Downey is also able to fully exploit the comic aspects of Stark's flaws, giving the picture a lighter tone that distinguishes it from most of the recent superhero movies.  As for the music, please note that the first bedroom scene is set to an instrumental version of the theme from the old Iron Man cartoon; you have to wait for the end credits for the Black Sabbath.  BTW, you will want to stay through all of the end credits.  Really.  I cannot stress that enough.NOW SHOWING: In addition to Iron Man,  which is currently scoring 95 percent on the ol' Tomatometer, this weekend's only other wide release is the counter-programming of Patrick dempsey in Made of Honor, which is scoring 19 percent.ROBERT DOWNEY, JR. is already looking ahead to a possible Iron Man sequel and added that he'd like to explore the burden his superhero responsibilities impose. One possible sequel storyline thread, Downey said, could be based on the "Demon in a Bottle" comic series. In it, an overwhelmed Stark becomes an alcoholic.GWYNETH PALTROW, on the Red Carpet for Iron Man, was asked whether she had any well wishes to share with ex-bf Brad Pitt, who is rumored to be on the way to fatherhood again, didn't even play the usual "I-wish-them-the-best" lip service, curtly saying, "no," and moving on.BRADGELINA: The potential release of a tape showing Jolie snorting and smoking heroin in the 1990s may do some serious damage to the soon-to-be mother of six's new reputation as a much hotter version of Mother Teresa.  Hey, it's in the National Enquirer, right?BRITNEY SPEARS: Bills for lawyers, rehab and psychiatric care, combined with the pop wreck's inability to work, may have cost Spears 61 million dollars.UMA THURMAN testified against her stalker Thursday; TMZ live-blogged it. BTW, it's not surprising that Uma didn't look at the defendant or in his lawyer's direction.  She was probably instructed by the prosecutor or her personal attorneys to speak to the jury.BEYONCE KNOWLES is knocked up? That's what multiple sources tell the Hollyscoop blog, which is allegedly why she and Jay-Z rushed their wedding.MARIAH CAREY & NICK CANNON married?  Carey's nephew was in the Bahamas, but his Facebook account throws doubt on the rumor.MILEY CYRUS on top of the controversy surrounding her portrait in Vanity Fair, has also been criticized for telling the magazine that Sex and the City is her "favorite show!" - and for comparing the racy series to her Disney mega-hit Hannah Montana. She watches the edited version on TBS. Meanwhile photog Annie Leibovitz has clammed up.JESSICA SIMPSON may be dispatched to jinx the Democratic National Convention in Denver... or so Pres. Bush joked in front of members of the Super Bowl-winning New York Giants who visited the White House Wednesday.ANNE HATHAWAY's boyfriend Raffaelo Follieri has agreed to pay 1.3 million bucks to settle a lawsuit with billionaire Ron Burkle, who had accused Follieri of squandering the sum to support his lavish lifestyle.  Earlier this month, Follieri was arrested and charged with trying to pass a bad check, reportedly for around 250K.THE WORLD'S 15 TOP-EARNING MODELS, according to Forbes magazine.  Giselle Bundchen towers over the rest -- even Heidi Klum -- but that is due to her savvy business sense off the catwalk.  Yes, there is a slideshow at the link, but the pics at the Daily Mail are better. Metro asks, "Is it all over for Naomi Campbell?"THE INCREDIBLE HULK has a new trailer online. Ed Norton's hair is pre-Hulked.GLOBAL WARMING will stop until at least 2015 because of natural variations in the climate, scientists have said. Yet we rarely hear stories about natural variations in the climate exaggerating the warming trend.SOMALIA: The US military killed a man believed to be the head of al-Qaeda in Somalia and 10 others in an airstrike overnight, an Islamic insurgent group said Thursday. The question now is whether his removal will take the energy out of the Islamists' Jihad or simply provoke a series of revenge attacks.IRAQ: The apparent respite in fighting ended as US forces killed an additional 27 Mahdi Army fighters and a senior Special Groups leader during a series of engagements in the afternoon and throughout the night in Sadr City. A group of Iraqi Shiite MPs is in Iran for talks with radical cleric Moqtada al-Sadr in a bid to end clashes between his fighters and troops that have killed hundreds of people, a Sadr aide said on Thursday. A tip from a member of the Sons of Iraq led directly to the capture of a key AQI terrorist, reportedly known for vehicle-borne improvised-explosive device attacks, improvised-explosive device attacks, sniper attacks on Coalition Forces, the kidnapping and murder of Iraqis, and weapons trafficking.  An Iraqi govt spokesman stated that the findings of the committee looking into the recently discovered mass-graves in the "Triangle of Death" proved involvement of AQI and other organized crime rings in the massacres.  The head of the Basra operations room revealed that 324 wanted and suspects were arrested in Basra during the last three weeks.DOG + KIDDIE SLIDE = ENTERTAINMENT.INCREDIBLE JOURNEY: A cat returned home five days later after making a 460 mile round trip to London.CRABS on a PLANE: The force of the crash broke off the plane's nose gear and crumpled the plane's fuselage. And while no one was hurt from the crash, one passenger aboard the plane did receive a number of crab pinches.TWO SENTIMENTAL GEEKS have been charged with second-degree burglary after they attempted to free a dog from the city animal shelter so they could take it to its owner's funeral over the weekend. Fri, 02 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=997 THE LONG BLONDES have gone to the dogs in the new video for "Guilt."JASON COLLETT the BSSer stopped by the World Cafe for a chat and mini-set of his '70s pop/rock & country-infused solo stuff, streaming on demand via NPR.THE HOBOKEN SOUND:  Banjamen Walker posts an excerpt from a 1985 documentary at WFMU's blog.  The Bongos, The Feelies, The Cucumbers, Gut Bank and Maxwell's all get shout outs.  Joe Piscopo makes a clueless cameo.THE MORNING BENDERS, drawing from '60s pop heavyweights like the Beach Boys, the Beatles, and the Kinks, are profiled in the SF Weekly and the San Francisco bay Guardian.  There's embedded video at the SFBG also. (Thx, LHB.)  You can stream a few more at BenderSpace.SLY STONE actually talks to PopMatters about why, at this relatively late date, he has chosen to make one of the most unlikely comebacks in pop history: "I could sit back and get royalties like people do at my age," he says. "But then I noticed that a lot of things were not being said."MUDCRUTCH formed in the mid '70s, but just released its debut album.  You may recognize at least one of the members in the video for "Orphan of the Storm."THE CONSTANTINES singer Bryan Webb talks to Canada's Sun about the power of positive singing.MOUNTAIN GOATS frontman John Darnielle, author of a book on Black Sabbath's Master of Reality, is guest-blogging at Powell's about other metal albums he might have chosen. (Thx LHB.)NICK CAVE is featured on a segment of Fresh Air, streming on demand from NPR, along with tracks from his new LP with The Bad Seeds, Dig, Lazurus, Dig!DO THE DOORS SUCK?  Idolator offers a point and counter-point (sorta) on this vital question.  IIRC, the Music Works position was that they could be a very passable bar band at times.TOM-KAT UPDATE: Cruise sent Holmes to Scientology boot camp at a remote, supersecret compound in Hemet, Calif, according to the ever-reliable Star magazine.JENNIFER ANISTON & JOHN MAYER were snapped looking very cozy in swimwear in Miami at InTouch Weekly.ROB LOWE faces claims of sexual harassment and wrongful termination from a second nanny.PAULA ABDUL seemed agitated and disoriented when asked to critique the first half of American Idol Tuesday, night, but claims it was an honest mistake that caused her to critique both of Jason Castro's songs (including one he had not performed yet).ASHLEE SIMPSON & PETE WENTZ:  Is creepy dad-manager Joe Simpson trying to land them a reality TV show like Newlyweds? Probably, though Ashlee and Pete's publicist tells OK! magazine they are not set to appear in Newlyweds.  Meanwhile, Wentz is being sued regarding a fight between his band, Fall Out Boy, and a "fan" at Schuba's Tavern in Chicago.JESSICA SIMPSON is calling Dallas QB Tony Romo her "future husband" and tells the June issue of Glamour that she was in fact set up with him through creepy dad-manager Joe.UMA THURMAN prepares to take the stand Thursday in the trial of a man accused of stalking her for two years.  Yesterday, her parents and employees testified about their encounters with the alleged stalker. In telephone calls to Thurman's mother and brother, and at least 19 emails to her father, Jack Jordan said he believed he and the Hollywood actress had met in a previous life and would never be happy unless they were together.LINDSAY LOHAN & SNOOP DOGG?  Collaborating on Li-Lo's new album, according to Roger Friedman.JACK NICHOLSON said Wednesday that "one last big romance" would be on his "bucket list."CHARLIE SHEEN:  Nici, a former L.A. madam who managed a stable of prostitutes that included two Playboy Playmates, tells Rolling Stone that she booked her girls for the "Two and a Half Men" star until last year.THE DARK KNIGHT: What do you know? A handheld bootleg of the new trailer.KATE HUDSON is the cover of People magazine's 100 Most Beautiful People list.  There is a sneak peek at the list online.COUNTERINSURGENCY: Dr. David Kilcullen, an adviser to Gen. Petraeus, has started writing a series on Political Maneuver in Counterinsurgency at the Small Wars Journal blog.  Part 1 is a case study on Road-Building in Kunar Province, Afghanistan, 2006-08.IRAN remained the world's "most active" state sponsor of terrorism as it tries to build regional influence and drive the US from the Middle East, a US government report said Wednesday. Supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei on Wednesday declared Iran was "not afraid" of sanctions over its contested nuclear program and would further step up its progress.IRAQ: Sadr City is experiencing a relative lull after several days of intense battles between the Mahdi army and US and Iraqi forces. The Iraqi government reported over 900 have been killed since fighting broke out in Sadr City at the end of March.  According to US and Iraqi reports compiled by The Long War Journal, 435 Mahdi Army fighters have been killed in and around Sadr City during the fighting. Leaders representing Moqtada Sadr are expected to meet with Iraqi leaders to discuss the violence. The US sees a window of opportunity to push for services - trash pickup, medical care, water, electricity - in a southern slice of the volatile district.  Also, Iraqi leaders are hoping to pressure Iran to stop aiding militias in Iraq by presenting Tehran with the latest evidence of weapons and training crossing the border, a senior defense official said Wednesday. Good luck.  Meanwhile, the Iraqi govt plans to hand over 12 Saudi detainees to Riyadh within a security agreement between the two countries.  And Iraqi authorities welcomed back 701 ancient artifacts plundered in the chaotic aftermath of the US-led invasion, worth hundreds of millions of dollars. A MAMA DUCK and her ducklings receive a police escort across Highway 512 in Washington state.  Video at the link.FUGITIVE MONKEYS, escaped from soon-to-be-opened Wild Safari animal park last Tuesday, remain on the lam near Lakeland, FL....AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT: A wild and crazy pigeon.LING LING, the only giant panda owned by Japan, died of old age Wednesday at Tokyo's Ueno Zoo, where he had been one of the most popular attractions, officials said. Thu, 01 May 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=996 FEIST sits for an interview on The Colbert Report, then plays "I Feel It All," which is introduced in the spangly "1 2 3 4 " top he got from Ms. F.  And Kevin Drew will be in for a shock some evening.DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE did six free songs for Daytrotter, some of which are to appear on the forthcoming Narrow Stairs LP.JIMI HENDRIX may have a sex tape, but the identity of the man in the film is fiercely disputed by experts and former associates.THE FOALS stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via MPR.ROGER WATERS: The fmr Pink Floyd frontman's inflatable pig has gone missing: "He escaped and went floating off into the desert," according to Coachella Fest spokeswoman Marcee Rondan.  There's a 10K award out for the porker. UPDATE: The pig is dead.THE SHINS perform an original song, "It's Okay, Try Again," for Nick Jr.'s show Yo Gabba Gabba! which will air May 23.SMOOSH: Chloe spoke with Exclaim! about her worst tour memories and some changes in the band.TINY MASTERS OF TODAY, another accomplished kid band, is profiled in the New York Daily News. Michael Palms, co-owner of the club Southpaw in Park Slope, gives bands like Tiny Masters a regular venue: "They write interesting songs about angst and rejecting pop culture, which is essentially what rock music is really all about."STEVE EARLE talks to the Dallas Morning News, where he seems to view the international movement of labor as different from the the international movement of capital.THE POSIES are getting a three-disc tribute from dozens of bands so obscure that even I haven't heard of them!MILEY CYRUS:  Photogate, Day 3 features reax from dad Billy Ray Cyrus, Rosie O'Donnell, Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt, Bill O' Reilly and Hilary Duff.CSI PALM SPRINGS: Gary Dourdan was busted in Palm Springs on suspicion of possessing heroin, cocaine, ecstasy and prescription drugs.MINDY McCREADY & ROGER CLEMENS had a longterm affair; the two met in a Florida karaoke bar when McCready was a 15-year-old aspiring singer and Clemens was a 28-year-old ace for the Red Sox and a married father of two. It wasn't until later, after McCready had moved to Nashville and become a country singing star, that the relationship turned intimate.BRADGELINA and their brood are holed up in Microsoft cofounder Paul Allen's vlla on the French Riviera, scouting locations for Jolie's next delivery.MY NAME IS DAD: Jason Lee and his girlfriend, Ceren Alkac, are expecting a baby.BRITNEY SPEARS gives onlookers a shock as she wanders into a hotel gym in nothing but a towel.MADONNA is finally shocked by a sexual practice.  And she only had to go to Africa.SCIENTOLOGY has started its own YouTube channel, but you just know they aren't going to post the really wacky stuff we want to watch.VANILLA ICE is off the hook on domestic abuse charges, marking the first time Ice has been off the hook in decades. Wife Laura Van Winkle retracted allegations that he had hit and kicked her during a spat at home.PAM ANDERSON has become a US citizen, further exposing systemic weaknesses at Immigration and Customs Enforcement.IRON MAN: There's an exclusive clip posted at Yahoo! Movies, plus a version with commentary from director Jon Favreau.  The Detroit Free Press calls it the buzz-magnet kiciking of this summer's movie season.OUR FRIENDS, THE SAUDIS: A governor in northern Saudi Arabia has ordered authorities to punish men who flirt with women in public places by cutting their hair, local media said Tuesday.  Which I suppose is better than beheading, but still...IRAN is demanding that Azerbaijan deliver a Russian shipment of nuclear equipment blocked at its border with Iran for the past three weeks. Meanwhile, Western scientists are intrigued by photos from Iran's nuclear site at Natanz.IRAQ: The US ambassador to the UN on Monday slammed the alleged destabilizing role of Iran and Syria in Iraq and urged them to stop the flow of weapons and foreign fighters into the country. Heavy fighting broke out between Coalition and Mahdi Army forces in Sadr City as US troops killed 28 Mahdi Army fighters after being ambushed during a patrol. Seven more Mahdi Army fighters were killed during strikes Monday. In Basra, shops and cafes have reopened as the pious young men who for years had been shutting them down -- declaring music "haram" (forbidden) and threatening to kill women for not wearing headscarfs -- have vanished.  Finally, a look at the improbable work of the self-proclaimed "Cat Lady of Baghdad."KNUT UPDATE: The once cuddly polar bear cub, now a grown psychopath addicted to human attention, may be gay. NTTAWWT.A GIANT BEAVER crashed into a Russian food store, smashing a shop window and several bottles of vodka.THE BIGGEST SQUID EVER CAUGHT, boasting a fearsome beak and razor-sharp hooks, may be small compared to others still lurking in the depths, scientists said Tuesday.A LEGLESS LIZARD and a DWARF WOODPECKER are among 14 discovered species believed to be new to science in central Brazil, a wildlife conservation group said on Tuesday.GATOR vs. GOLFER: A golfer used a four iron and a rake to save the life of a diver attacked by a giant 11ft alligator as he searched for lost balls in a lake at his local course in Tampa, Florida. Wed, 30 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=995 PRINCE rocked the indie kids at Coachella with a surprise cover of Radiohead's "Creep." Catchit before the Purple One's lawyers do, won't you?NEW RELEASES: Les Savy Fav, Joy Division, Kid Creole, Sarah McLachlan, and more are streaming in full this week via Spinner. Portishead releases its Third. The Constantines visit Kensington Heights.  Robert Forster introduces The Evangelist. Bearsuit goes Oh:lo.THE LEGENDARY CAPITOL RECORDS ECHO CHAMBERS are threatened by a condo development.JUSTIN TOWNES EARLE plays and talks on Morning Edition about his addiction and his musician-dad, Steve: "It's a really hard family to rebel in. I could have become an accountant. Or I could have become a Republican - that would have really pissed him off."SHE & HIM: Zooey Deschanel tells the LA Times she's uninterested in keeping up with new bands, preferring instead the thrill of "discovering something old that might've been forgotten. I like the feel of being in a musty record store," she says with a laugh.I WANT CANDY from The Strangeloves and a super-charged Bow Wow Wow for Twofer Tuesday. TIFT MERRITT gets riled up when the Irish Independent raises the tricky subject of genre and how she's perceived as an artist.LAURA GIBSON stopped by Oregon Public Broadcasting for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand, broken up into handy segments.NICK CAVE talks to The List about... the press: "I'm represented in all sorts of different ways. But it does become frustrating to read a lot of what's written about me. The same set of anecdotes strung together by yet another lazy writer who lacks any imagination. Not you of course (laughs). It's frustrating that no matter what your efforts are in terms of music the press lags behind."THE BYRDS are set to release a recording of their 1971 appearance at London's Royal Albert Hall - featuring a line up of Roger McGuinn, Clarence White, Skip Battin and Gene Parsons. Roger McGuinn told Uncut that the recording came from his private collection and that more releases of a similar kind would probably follow it.MILEY CYRUS: Everybody weighs in on Hannah Montana's semi-topless Vanity Fair photoshoot, from photographer Annie Leibovitz to Jamie Lee Curtis to the Christian Coalition.  Along with reax from Disney and The View, The Superficial looks at the behind-the-scenes pics and opines that she's probably not really embarrassed.BRITNEY SPEARS: The Child Custody Evaluation report is in, and it's a "mixed bag" that "makes it more likely that Britney will show for the hearing" on May 6, according to TMZ.AMY POEHLER & WILL ARNETT are to become first-time parents, in a fabulous promotion for Baby Mama.CHERI OTERI, formerly of SNL, mourns the loss of her father, who was stabbed to death on Saturday in Nashville.MARIAH CAREY & NICK CANNON are engaged?TOM-KAT UPDATE: Oprah Winfrey's upcoming interview with Cruise includes questions about Scientology, his verbal smackdown with Matt Lauer on the Today show and, yes, the infamous couch-jumping incident.  Winfrey leaked this and more during last weekend's Vegas taping of a joint interview with Tina Turner and Cher, who talks about her affair with Cruise at the start of his career.ANGIE EVERHART was busted for DUI last Thursday, and no longer engaged to Joe Pesci.SCOTT WEILAND, once again the frontman for Stone Temple Pilots, has been sentenced to 192 hours in county jail for his November DUI arrest.KATHY GRIFFIN has split from billionaire Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak, but it seems amicable.THE HOBBIT movies are officially under the directorial hand of Guillermo del Toro. Though no screenplay deal's been set, it's expected that the "LOTR" scripting team of Jackson, Fran Walsh and Philippa Boyens will collaborate with Del Toro.  TheOneRing already has an interview with del Toro, who says -- among other things -- that Ian McKellen and Andy Serkis seem game for more.HEATHER LOCKLEAR still looks quite healthy at 46.  BONUS:  Add her ex-pal Denise Richards for a Gratuitous Twofer Tuesday to mark the onset of bikini season.CARRIE FISHER reveals that she got quite cozy with Harrison Ford while waging Star Wars.LEE ELIA: It is the 25th anniversary of one of the most notorious sports rants evah.  Present and former Chicagoans may remember that Les Grobstein and a young Mark Giangreco were responsible for recording the Cubs manager's profanity-laden tirade.MIDEAST MYSTERY: CIA Director Michael Hayden said Monday that the alleged Syrian nuclear reactor destroyed by an Israeli airstrike in September would have produced enough plutonium for one or two bombs within a year of becoming operational.IRAN: A top Iranian judiciary official warned Monday against the "destructive" cultural and social consequences of importing Barbie, Batman, Spiderman and Harry Potter dolls.IRAQ:  TIME asks, "Is AQI is back in Baghdad?"  ITM's Omar Fadhil asks, "Is AQI teaming with Moqtada al-Sadr?" US forces killed 45 Shiite militiamen in Baghdad in fierce fighting that included a tank battle with dozens of gunmen who attacked a checkpoint under cover of a dust storm. The CFR's Greg Bruno looks at the upside and potential downside of the "Sons of Iraq."  Meanwhile, the McClatchy chain reports that one of the most powerful men in Iraq is Brig. Gen. Qassem Suleimani, who commands the Iranian Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps' Quds Force, an elite paramilitary and espionage organization whose mission is to expand Iran's influence in the Middle East.WEINER DOG RACES in Austin. Let's go to the slideshow.DOLPHIN DIES IN MIDAIR COLLISION at SeaWorld in Orlando, FL. Sharky was 30 years old.BEE FAITHFUL: A religious beekeeper in Serbia has started making beehives shaped like tiny monasteries and churches "because bees have a soul too."SPIDER PLAGUE closed a tiny Australian hospital....AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT: A chihuahua in a scuba suit. Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=994 DUFFY brings the Dusty-esque melancholy in the video for "Warwick Avenue."THE B-52s played for WXPN at the Electric Factory in Philadelphia; you can stream the whole gig on demand via NPR.  NICOLE ATKINS talks to the Times of London about dreams and monsters, and how Rick Rubin put her Neptune City album on hold to remix it.ALL SONGS CONSIDERED:  New tracks from Circulatory System, Elf Power, the Black Keys, Gnarls Barkley and folk singer Laura Gibson are featured in the latest edition of the long-running series from NPR.THE NATIONAL frontman Matt Berninger talks to JamBands about R.E.M., lyrics and Phish.WEEKEND VAMPIRE talks to The List, with guitarist and singer Ezra Koenig commenting on the African rhythms in some of their music: "But it was important for us, if we were going to be playing rock instruments, not to use the same rhythms, the same styles of playing that so much rock has used. It becomes kind of boring."  The band was joined by a drum line on Kimmel for a rendition of "Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa."MICK JONES (The Clash, B.A.D., Carbon/Silicon) has written a song ttitled, "Don't tase me, bro!" after the arrest of an excitable college student.CLOUD CULT stopped by WNYC for a chat and a twofer you can stream on demand va NPR.AMY WINEHOUSE was released from a London police station Saturday after spending a night in custody following her arrest for an assault -- but her distraught dad wants her forcibly locked up in a mental hospital for her own good.PHIL COLLINS is to retire from recording and performing after over 30 years in the music industry.MILEY CYRUS issued a statement apologizing for a series of playfully provocative photos that circulated on the Internet last week, as well as those from a racy, as-yet unreleased Vanity Fair photo shoot in which she appears to be nude. Retail sales for her Hannah Montana franchise are expected to total about $1 billion in 2008. A motion picture is in the works for 2009 and Ms. Cyrus signed a seven-figure book deal with the Disney Book Group last week.WEEKEND BOX OFFICE:  Over the the weekend before summer box office season, Baby Mama takes the top slot with 18 million on a 30 million budget.  Harold & Kumar 2 followed with 14 million on a 12 million budget.  That's good, as Baby Mam may have more legs as a counter to Iron Man this weekend and Speed Racer next weekend.  Harold & Kumar made almost as much as the entire theater run of the original, thouhg that went on to make 60 million in DVD sales.  Forbidden Kingdom edged out Forgetting Sarah Marshall, though the latter dropped only 38 percent -- not bad in the face of Baby Mama.  The Judd Apatow production has laready recouped its budget.  Nim's Island rounds out the Top Five and also recoups its production budget.  Deception debuted in tenth and is DOA, for all sorts of good reasons.JENNIFER ANISTON & JOHN MAYER are in a hot new romance - thanks to matchmaker Sheryl Crow, according to the ever-reliable National Enquirer.BENNIFER, ROB LOWE, PAM ANDERSON and ASHLEE SIMPSON were among the celebs attending this year's White House Correspondents' Association dinner Saturday night. "Pamela Anderson and Mitt Romney in the same room?" Pres. Bush said. "Isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse?"SCARLETT JOHANSSON talks to The Scotsman about her new album, and sitting in with the Jesus And Mary Chain with a show at the 2007 Coachella Festival.SHANNON ELIZABETH & DEREK HOUGH getting married in Vegas?  I'm pretty sure they were kidding.MADONNA hired her gardener to direct her new documentary about HIV/AIDS orphans in Malawi, which delivers a sizeable wallop of the Kabbalah Center of Los Angeles without informing the audience about what's going on.GYLLENSPOON: Looking more serious all the time.RUMER WILLIS picks up where Carrie Underwood left off? CHRISTINA RICCI is used to steamy scenes, but nothing could prepare the actress for being groped a chimpanzee on the set of Speed Racer.UNTOONED: Homer Simpson, Mario and Jessica Rabbit are made flesh through the magic of Photoshop at Pixeloo.  Jessica even has a video showing how it's done.GLOBAL SOMETHING: While the last Arctic summer was the warmest on record, we had a cold summer with a sea-ice maximum in the Antarctic.INDONESIA: Chastity belts, which went out of fashion with knights in shining armor and damsels in distress, are making a comeback in the massage parlors of East Java. In recent years, conservative Islamic values have gained influence in a society that has long enjoyed liberal freedoms, such as easy access to alcohol, gambling and the sex trade.IRAN: A ship contracted by the US Navy had to fire warning shots in the direction of two unidentified speedboats in the Gulf, US military officials say.  In January, the US said speedboats from Iran had harassed US Navy ships in the Gulf.  In the latest incident, Tehran said its vessels had had no confrontations with US ships.IRAQ: Less than one week after threatening to conduct an uprising against the Iraqi government and US forces, Moqtada al Sadr called for the Mahdi Army to maintain the self-imposed cease-fire. Five British hostages who were kidnapped in Iraq almost a year ago are being held inside Iran by Revolutionary Guards, according to two separate sources in the Middle East and London. If confirmed, the involvement of Revolutionary Guards would be seen as evidence that senior figures in the Iranian government had backed the decision to hold them in the country.  Have the US's three most important Asian alliances - with Australia, Japan and South Korea - been strengthened by the Iraq campaign?PIERRE the PENGUIN,  a venerable 25 years old, was going bald -- so the California Academy of Sciences had a wetsuit created to help him get back in the swim of things.  Let's go to the video.THE SQUIRREL THREAT: It used to be Grey vs. red, but now mutant black squirrels have already taken over in parts of England and appear to be spreading. THE BIRDS: Hungry seagulls have forced playtime to be cancelled in Croatian schools after they started grabbing pupils' packed lunches.THE SWARM:  A giant cloud of thousands of bees mysteriously appeared and began to swirl in a "tornado pattern" around a Central Florida Mexican restaurant. Video at the link.GONNA NEED A BETTER BOAT: A day after a deadly shark attack near San Diego, a hardy few ignored warnings that a killer great white might still be lurking below the surface and paddled back into the Pacific Ocean on Saturday. What say you, Police Chief Brody? (nsfw) Mon, 28 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=993 THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE:...with THE CUTTING EDGE!  One of the original MTV indie rock showcases, backed in part by IRS Records, airing from March 1983 to September 1987. Set the Wayback Machine to 1985 to share some BBQ in Austin, TX with Zeitgeist (later The Reviers).  Daniel Johnson has a cameo in that clip, but is featured in this one.  You'll see a young Alejandro Escovedo playing in the True Believers.  Also in a rootsy vein is a segment with Lone Justice.  The show's host, Daniel Zaremba, brings the garage with his band, The Fleshtones, in N'awlins.  Going further afield, there's a segment with Squeeze.  All those clips are on Yahoo!, but there are also clips from Flat Duo Jets and Red Hot Chili Peppers on the Tube that date back to 1984.LOU REED & LAURIE ANDERSON: Hitched!COACHELLA: Various acts from the big fest will be streaming at AT&T's Blueroom Fri-Sun nights, starting just before 6 ET.DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS drove by the World Cafe for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via NPR.PETER MOREN talks to The Stranger about his solo album, F. Scott Fitzgerald and the next Peter Bjorn & John album (which is finished, and instrumental).  JANE'S ADDICTION reuinited at the first-ever NME Awards USA; winners and shaky cam video at Stereogum.SMOOSH rocked Kids-At-Work Day at the Bryant Park Project; you can stream videos of "Great Skies" and "Dark Shine" via NPR.DESTROYER:  Dan Bejar talks to DC's Express about playing with different drummers -- a phenomenon familiar to Pate fans.THE CONNELLS: From the "Where are they now?" file.  Dig 'em. Stream 'em.  Pretend, for a brief moment, that you are Craig O'Neill.  Unless you are Craig O'Neill, in which case you are beyond all help.TIFT MERRITT stopped by the World Cafe for a chat and mini-set you can stream on demand via NPR.JOAN JETT and her longtime manager, Kenny Laguna, talk to the San Joaquin Record about her longevity and the upcoming Runaways movie.AMY WINEHOUSE was facing arrest last night after allegedly attacking two men while out on a wild drug-fuelled bender.CUTOUT BIN: From Buzzcocks to Blues Magoos, from Game Theory to Glen Campbell, from Al Wilson to ABBA, The Replacements, The Kinks, Nilsson, Marti Jones and the Mountain Goats this Friday's fortuitous finds overfloweth and can be jukeboxed or streamed individually on the Pate page at the ol' HM.TOM-KAT UPDATE:  Cruise is headed back to Oprah's couch for the May sweeps!SCARLETT JOHANSSON is streaming six tracks from her debut album, Anywhere I Lay My Head.NOW SHOWING: This weekend's wide releases are the Tina Fey-Amy Poehler comedy Baby Mama, currently scoring 57 percent on the ol' Tomatometer; Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, currently scoring 55 percent; and the thriller Deception, scoring 10 percent.WESLEY SNIPES was sentenced to 36 months in prison for tax evasion, the maximum sentence allowed.CARMEN ELECTRA is engaged to her boyfriend, Rob Patterson, the former touring guitarist for Korn.JESSICA SIMPSON & TONY ROMO seem like the picture-perfect couple, but OK! magazine reports that the pneumatic blonde's creepy dad-manager Joe is a problem-causing third wheel in the relationship.ASHLEE SIMSPON, meanwhile, continued to dodge pregnancy rumors, even as Ellen DeGeneres rubbed her maybe bump.ASHTON KUTCHER has webbed feet. Yes, really. Pics at the link.JIMMY FALLON is set to take Conan O'Brien's job as host of "Late Night" in 2009. Conan will be taking over for Jay Leno, who will leave the "Tonight" show in May 2009 as part of a forced retirement.GARY COLEMAN is splitting from his new wife Shannon Price on a special two-part session of Divorce Court.  Diff'rent Strokes, and all that.MEGAN FOX tops FHM magazine's annual 100 Sexiest Women in the World readers' poll; you will find a pop wreck at the bottom.  But I think there may be some dudes in TV Guide's Sexiest Stars 2008, for those who go that way. Call it Gratuitous Friday.WISH LIST: The Gryphon attack glider, designed to penetrate combat zones at 135 miles per hour, could revolutionize the art of parachuting. Video and pics at the link.AL QAEDA increasingly faces sharp criticism from once-loyal sympathizers who openly question its ideology and tactics, including attacks that kill innocent Muslims, according to US intelligence officials, counter-terrorism experts and the group's own communications.MIDEAST MYSTERY: North Korea helped Syria construct a nuclear reactor that was "within weeks of completion" when Israel destroyed the facility in September, the Bush admin. said on Thursday.  A CIA briefing for Congress contains a video that brings together a compilation of still images, including satellite imagery, ground imagery, and photographs taken inside the facility. One photograph shows a North Korean nuclear scientist Chon Chibu standing beside his Syrian counterpart. Mr Chon, who worked at North Korea's Yongbyon plutonium reactor, has previously dealt with US officials.IRAN: NATO's secretary-general told Gulf Arab states on Thursday that Iran's nuclear ambitions were a major threat to regional stability.AFGHANISTAN:  At Jane's US Defense Conference, Anthony Cordesman gave a briefing on Afghanistan and Iraq. Cordesman sees far more progress toward  "armed nation-building" in Iraq, adding that withdrawing troops there will not solve problems in Afghanistan.IRAQ: The Baghdad Zoo and Entertainment Experience, a massive American-style amusement park that will feature a skateboard park, rides, a concert theatre and a museum, is being designed by the firm that developed Disneyland. New data on Iraq oil revenues suggests that country's government will reap an even larger than expected windfall this year - as much as 70 billion - according to the special US auditor for Iraq. Moqtada al-Sadr is considering setting aside his political ambitions and restarting a full-scale fight against US-led forces.  The reconstruction of the Samarra shrine helps bridge sectarian divides.  The New York Times reports that Iraq's largest Sunni bloc has agreed to return to Prime Minister al-Maliki's cabinet -- about a week after you read it here.DOG NURSES MOTHERLESS KITTENS in Burlington, IA. Let's go to the awww...some video....AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT:  A six-legged kitty.  Video at the link.KILLER STUNT BEAR UPDATE: State work safety officials opened an investigation today into the death of an exotic-animal trainer who was killed by a 700-pound grizzly bear while filming a promotional video, a spokeswoman for the state Department of Industrial Relations said.  The AP has part off the 911 call.A ZEBRA was discovered in Emory University's Seney Hall about 8 a.m. Wednesday.  Georgian Zebra trifecta now in play.STRAY DOGS saved a baby girl who was abandoned in a mound of mud by her mother near a remote village in India. "The dogs removed the soil around and began to bark and the baby started crying which drew attention of the local villagers," Ram Narayan Sahani, a senior government official, said on Tuesday. Fri, 25 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=992 SHE & HIM brought YO LA TENGO as backup when they hit the Peacock to play "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?"KEITH RICHARDS, LORD of the UNDEAD, answers reader questions for Blender magazine.  It's all embedded audio, because who would want to try to transcribe Keef to English?THE DUKE SPIRIT guitarist Dan Higgins talks to JamBase about the band's hard-to-peg sound (mid-period VU meets early Stones, with a dash of Debbie Harry?).  If you didn't stream their Neptune album when it was on Spinner this month, you can still stream extended clips via the album's mini-site.  JamBase also has a full song.FAKE BEATLES:  I meant to flag this for The Rutles reunion, but was reminded to link Gaylord Fields's series at WFMU when The Knickerbockers' "Lies" popped up yesterday.  Many more Faux Fours streaming at the link.THE B-52s dummer-turned-guitarist Keuth Strickland shuffles his iPod for the "Random Rules" feature at The A.V. Club.THE CONSTANTINES rock kinda hard in the new video for "Hard Feelings."BIRDS OF AVALON do the four free songs thing (one nifty one unreleased) for Daytrotter, which name-drops The Raconteurs and raft of 70s bands -- none of which fully nails the band's sound.ERYKAH BADU talks to Blender and says things like: "Time is for white people. It doesn't work with me."SUPERGRASS drummer Danny Goffey talks to PopMatters about the band's endurance, recording in Berlin, and more... A/V linkage there also.MUSIC BLOGS and their promo value are surveyed at the Guardian: A New York University study published in February, Does Chatter Matter?, found that the volume of blog posts about a new album can significantly affect sales.BRITNEY SPEARS has reportedly dropped 20 pounds in new pics that somehow turn up only in Star magazine.  The Daily Mail thinks Spears is slimming down to get back on How I Met Your Mother, but I would guess it's connected to her negotiations with Bally's Fitness Clubs.MAMA LYNNE SPEARS is disappointed that Jamie Lynn gt knocked up, and prays for Britney to be a better mother... when she isn't talking to Life & Style magazine.THE McCARTNEYS:  Sir Paul unveiled an exhibition of his late wife Linda's photographs (which was her actual talent), while Heather Mills was the subject of a TV program featuring damning revelations from former friends and estranged relatives. One of the former friends, Denise Hewitt, described the months the pair allegedly spent working as £10,000-a-night prostitutes, including acting out sizzling lesbian fantasies for their rich clients. OJ SIMPSON has asked Donald Trump to allow him to appear on the next season of Celebrity Apprentice.JOHN CLEESE faces a costly divorce from his third wife which could see him hand over two homes, half his earnings and maintenance of almost £1 million a year. Cleese was said to be taken aback by the scale of the divorce claim.IRON MAN: Robert Downey, Jr. talks to the New York Times  about Tony Stark's demons and ultimately, his own.  Paramount and Marvel are trying to lower expectations for the movie, though they still think they can make 50-60 million next weekend.HEATH LEDGER:  Actress and baby mama Michelle Williams told friends that the late actor had twice visited her as a "shadowy apparition."PETER FALK looked dazed and confused as he walked near his Beverly Hills home on Tuesday afternoon. Sad pics at the link.STAR JONES has filed for divorce from husband of three-and-a-half years, Al Reynolds, who is getting ready to rumble.TINA FEY, promoting her upcoming movie Baby Mama, tells the Philly Inquirer just how busy she is: "If I get enough time in the morning to go to the bathroom and brush my teeth and put on the clothes that I wore the day before, that's it. The idea of putting lotion on my legs, that's not happening."  She tells the NYDN that she and co-star Amy Poehler reworked the script to take out some of the car jokes, to avoid having to shoot for weeks in hot cars: "But it's not like we added anything really Lifetime-y. I think by and large, there's not that big a difference between guy and girl humor. Funny is funny."  Defamer posts video of Universal's three marketing strategies for the movie.GO SPEED GO!  There's a good review and all-new car-fu in seven clips from Speed Racer posted at Collider (mild spoilers).TERROR in the UK: Police have foiled 15 terror plots since the turn of the century, with suspects continuing to emerge from unexpected quarters, senior officers said yesterday. The figure emerged as police backed the Government's controversial proposals to hold terrorist suspects for more than 28 days without charge. Meanwhile, a network of ex-radicals launched on Tuesday a movement to fight the same ideology that they once worked to spread.MIDEAST MYSTERY: According to the L.A. Times, the CIA will tell Congress today in classified briefings that the North Koreans had begun to build a nuclear reactor at a site in Syria bombed by the Israelis last year.PAKISTAN's new government has drafted a peace agreement with Taliban militants in its troubled tribal belt bordering Afghanistan, officials and a rebel spokesman said Wednesday.  The Jonestown Foundation has much more detail.IRAQ: The Bush admin. picked Gen. Petraeus to take charge of operations across the Middle East and chose his former No. 2 to take over in Baghdad. Austin Bay argues that the battle for Basra is an integrated political-military operation and the most decisive example of a country-building measure we have seen since Saddam fell in April 2003. US and UK special forces are carrying out operations in Basra against Shia militiamen, a Western military source has told the BBC. Iraq's national security advisor has claimed Iran is hosting 100 al-Qaeda leaders and members, some of whom are under house arrest.THERE'S A GATOR IN MY KITCHEN: Let's go to the video.A HOLLYWOOD STUNT BEAR killed one of his handlers during a rehearsal for a film stunt.THE FIRST WILDLIFE HIGHWAY to enable animals and plants to escape the worst effects of climate change will be announced today. A corridor 30 miles (50km) long and up to 10 miles wide is to be created in the Severn Vale in Gloucestershire to provide an escape route for wildlife.PUPS and their pop stars; a photo gallery. (Thx, Dad.)RAW VIDEO of the Somali wild a$$, an extremely rare horse species born at the St. Louis Zoo. Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=991 GRIZZLY BEAR played a new song, "While You Wait For The Others," on the Peacock the other night.  It has me waiting for more...THE REPLACEMENTS are thinking of semi-reforming after 17 years. Tommy Stinson tells Billboard that he and Westerberg were close to accepting lucrative festival offers this year.  Hold out for Chris Mars!  Meanwhile, PopMatters uses the reissues for a critical evaluation of the band's Twin/Tone output.THE HELIO SEQUENCE stopped by KEXP for a chat and mini-set you can stream (together or just the music) via NPR.THE MOUNTAIN GOATS: John Darneille talks to PopMatters about the Mighty Riff, the uneasy relationship between indie and metal camps, and the life experiences behind his new book on Black Sabbath's Master of Reality.HEADLIGHTS singer-keyboardist Erin Fein talks to The A.V. Club on harmonies, making a summer record and more.  Plus vidoe at the link.MATES OF STATE release the video for "Get Better," from their upcoming release, Re-Arrange Us.KATHLEEN EDWARDS talks songwriting, major-league exposure and human behavior of the worst kind with the Toronto Star.DESTROYER:  So Much Silence has posted stream/download for a vinyl rip of "Madame Butterflies," a heretofore unreleased track that appears on a 7" split-single issued for Record Store Day.FEIST tells the Dallas Morning News that the success of "1 2 3 4:' is a double-edged sword and that her backup plan is to franchise herself with Feist puppets.THE TOP TEN ACTS going green, compiled by Reuters for Earth Day.NATALIE PORTMAN was the unfortunate victim of a surprise soaking by a pooch who mistook her for a fire hydrant at a downtown NYC dog run.  Or the dog may have seen the Star Wars prequels.  But hanging with Devendra Banhart clearly puts Portman in a groovy mood, as he was hugging the paparazzi just moments beforehand.LINDSAY LOHAN is denying falling off the wagon on her possibly fake Facebook page under the name "Lindsay Ronson."  And allegedly screaming at Ashley Olsen to "Get your 15-year-old 'Full House' a$$ away from my girlfriend," referring to lesbian lover Samantha Ronson.EWAN MacGREGOR says he is "fine" after having a cancerous mole removed from just below his right eye.RICHIE SAMBORA has been charged with two counts of DUI, but escapes child endangerment charges.AL PACINO & ROBERT DeNIRO are ripped at length in the L.A. Times: "The two icons of '70s New Hollywood, heroes to a generation of young actors and filmmakers, have become parodies of themselves, making payday movies and turning in performances that are hollow echoes of the electrically charged work they did in such films as Serpico, Dog Day Afternoon, Mean Streets and Taxi Driver."SHANNON ELIZABETH was... wait for it...  caught canoodling with her Dancing With the Stars partner Derek Hough on Thursday, while frolicking at the beach in Malibu.  Of course, it may be just for show - a cynical ploy for votes in the hoofing contest.HEATHER MILLS gave Sir Paul McCartney an ultimatum to marry her or she would leave him, according to a friend and ex-prostitute.  I'm shocked.DAVE NAVARRO was... wait for it... caught canoodling a dancer of indetermiate gender backstage at his Miami concert.  Pic at the link.JULIA ROBERTS just says "no" to deodorant.  Video at the link.PENELOPE CRUZ is setting pulses racing with her steamy new film, Elegy.  The pics at the link may well be NSFW; the video at Egotastic certainly is.  Call it Gratuitous Wednesday.ELISHA CUTHBERT says many men blow their big chance of a romance with her by committing first-date sins.  Seriously, who goes to a movie with Cuthbert and falls asleep?  Who goes to a movie with Cuthbert and watches the movie?  Who takes Cuthbert to a movie instead of chatting her up?  ALSO: Cuthbert is on the cover of this month's Maxim magazine.  Call it Doubly Gratuitous Wednesday.OUR FRIENDS, THE SAUDIS executed a convicted murderder with the 48th beheading in the Kingdom this year.IRAN: Seventy-five young people accused of 'immoral acts' have been arrested by police at a birthday party in the city of Shiraz. Dangerous drivers in Iran face being flogged under a tough new law that comes into effect next month.IRAQ:  The national government  began releasing thousands of detainees accused of all but the worst of crimes during the 2003-2008 time period, most of them Sunnis -- fulfilling another demand of the US Congress and the Sunnis in Iraq towards national reconciliation.  The Iraqi army command in Basra is giving top leaders of the Mahdi Army in the city 24 hours to surrender.  Anthony H. Cordesman argues that Prime Minister al-Maliki's offensive in Basra is more of a power struggle with Sadr than an effort to deal with security, ‘militias,' and ‘criminals.'  I would argue it is both; having the Mahdi Army turn into another Iranian-backed group like Hezbollah was likely too big a risk for the Iraqi govt and for the US.  Moreover, al-Sadr may not be that popular even within his own family these days.SAY WHAT?  The talking goat is cracking this woman up.A PLUCKY EWE gave birth to a whopping five lambs - beating odds of one in a million.  Awww...some pic at the link.BRITISH BEEKEEPERS beg Parliament to prevent an economic and ecological disaster, as honey bees are under threat from a mysterious disease which is spreading across the world.A HEDGEHOG which had fallen down a hole outside a Yorkshire Dales hotel was rescued by the local fire brigade.  Much like the Jessica McClure story, but with Spiny Norman.ITALIAN WALL LIZARDS introduced to a tiny island off the coast of Croatia are evolving in ways that would normally take millions of years to play out, new research shows.  Don't buy real estate in Tokyo. Wed, 23 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=990 THE KOOKS hope to crack the Star-Spangled Ceiling with their second album, Konk -- named after Ray Davies's studio, where it was recorded.  The single is "Always Where I Need To Be."NEW RELEASES: Albums from Billy Bragg, El Perro Del Mar, A.A. Bondy, Flight of the Conchords, The Replacements reissues and Love's Forever Changes are among those streaming this week at Spinner.THE CONSTANTINES singer/guitarist Bryan Webb tells DC's Express about how touring affects your ability to play AC/DC and your reaction to "Islands in the Stream," which they cover with Feist.SHE & HIM talk separately to Pitchfork about the importance of musical history in their collaboration, as well as how people react to them and their material.  You can still stream the album via Merge.DAN BEJAR talks to the Duke Chronicle via e-mail about his lengthy career with Destroyer, New Pornographers and Swan Lake, and his upcoming tour.  You can stream the new Destroyer LP via Merge.THE REPLACEMENTS reissues make for a natural Twofer Tuesday of "Kick Your Door Down" and that version of "Bast*rds of Young" that the lawyers are usually good at keeping offline.SANDY DENNY: Thirty years after her untimely, lonely death, the woman lauded as the British Joni Mitchell may finally get the recognition she deserves.BIG DIPPER: Gary Waleik tells the Boston herald that the band's reunion really got rolling after reading a blog post by Merge records owner Mac McCaughan saying someone needed to put out a good Big Dipper collection.  You can still stream the collection via Merge.  Yeah, it was Merge-heavy today; no, they aren't paying me.IT'S NOT A RECORD STORE, IT'S A HANGOUT:  To celebrate Record Store Day, singer-songwriter James McMurtry shared a few memories with All Things Considered of hanging out - and awkwardly self-promoting - in record stores.  PopMatters, Jennifer Makowsky looks back at the way High Fidelity celebrates the era of the dusty record store and the mixtape.PETE DOHERTY denies taking heroin while incarcerated in Wormwood Scrubs.  Meanwhile, the troubled singer has been kicked out of the Wiltshire pad he hired when he last came out of rehab, after spraying blood all over the walls.SCARLETT JOHANSSON has leaked "Falling Down" and "Anywhere I lay My Head" from her Tom Waits covers album to... mixed reactions.  She may have peaked with her rendition of Gershwin's "Summertime."LINDSAY LOHAN was spotted off the wagon, drinking Grey Goose and Red Bull cocktails at a party deejayed by pal Samantha Ronson last Saturday.RYAN PHILIPPE talks about the effect the paparazzi have had on his kids, which is pretty sad.OWEN WILSON & KATE HUDSON were... wait for it... caught canoodling at her 29th birthday party last Saturday.HARRY POTTER star Daniel Radcliffe need only mention his attraction to a mystery girl he met an Australian film function and the young lady is apparently tracked down and headed for London.JESSICA SIMPSON & TONY ROMO got into some messy cake-play at his 28th birthday party.  Life & Style reports that the pneumatic blonde's romance with Tony Romo is responsible for Simpson dialing back the makeup and hair care -- which certainly sounds nicer than the possibility that Simpson is making much less than she once did and can't afford to have hair and makeup people on call 24/7.SIENNA MILLER is decked out in a leather catsuit for her part in the movie adaptation of G.I Joe.  So why did you read to the end of that sentence?BRUCE CAMPBELL, who will be starring in the upcoming 2008 film My Name is Bruce, which he directed and co-produced, answers PopMatters' infamous 20 Questions.CAMERON DIAZ got some friendly support from her exes Justin Timberlake and John Mayer as her family held a memorial service for her late father Sunday.DAVID HASSELHOFF is back in the hospital, but not for rehab.  Phew!QUANTUM of SOLACE: RottenTomatoes has a bunch of behind-the-scenes promos for the next James Bond flick.  But the Daily Mail has pics of the £134,000 Aston Martin DBS that plunged into Lake Garda in Italy on the way to the set.AFGHANISTAN: The Afghan Army and police forces should be able to secure most of Afghanistan by 2011, allowing international forces to start withdrawing, according to the US commander of the NATO-led force in Afghanistan, General Dan McNeill.IRAN: The UN nuclear agency's deputy chief arrived in Tehran for talks with Iranian officials on allegations that Iran is testing high explosives and seeking to design a missile re-entry vehicle, two features which could have use for nuclear weapons.IRAQ: Iraqi soldiers took control of the last bastions of the cleric Moktada al-Sadr's Mahdi Army militia in Basra. Foreign Minister Hoshiyar Zebari rebuked al-Sadr for his threat of all out war.  US warplanes dropped bombs overnight in the east Baghdad district of Sadr City where Shia militiamen are battling security forces, residents said on Monday.  A US general said on Sunday that the increasingly sophisticated attacks carried out by Shiite extremists in Iraq were evidence they were getting extra aid from Iranian groups in the country.  Al Karama, a new political front, is joining together tribal sheikhs and heads of awakening councils in Baghdad, a group of technocrats and members of armed factions that have fought against AQI.  Three months after US forces dropped tons of bombs on Arab Jubur and put AQI to flight, farmers are everywhere out in their fields tending their tomatoes.AN ENGINEER'S GUIDE TO CATS: Let's go to the video. The cat yodeling is excellent.KAISER the BULLDOG has shocked her owner - after giving birth to a whopping 20 pups.  Awww...some pics at the link.INCREDIBLE JOURNEY:  Moon, a Siberian husky that ran off during a road-trip rest stop apparently made her way nearly 80 miles across Nevada's high desert and two mountain ranges to return home a week later.GEORGE the HEDGEHOG has shed nearly a quarter of its body weight after adopting a high protein diet similar to the Atkins plan.PYTHON vs POLICEMAN in a life-or-death struggle in a Eugene, OR pet shop. Tue, 22 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=989 A FINE FRENZY: Alison Sudol confesses to the Times of London: "I'm not very rock'n'roll.. I don't drink, I don't smoke and I don't party after a gig. I prefer to read."  Indeed, Sudol has an online book club, and recently shared some of her favorites at LHB. The live video for "You Picked Me" is indirectly via Amber, who will be delighted to learn that Sudol is also vertically challenged, loves books (including The Fountainhead), cheese and swearing.THE PIPETTES have two new members, Ani and Anna, as RiotBecki and Rosay have left to pursue other musical projects.  More details at P-Fork.  Disappointing, though I'll reserve judgment, given that the concept was always that of disposable pop band.KATE NASH played the World Cafe on Friday; you can stream the gig on demand via NPR.MY MORNING JACKET has released "Evil Urges" -- the title track of the upcoming album -- for downlaod; you can also stream it via the 'Gum Mix.HOT CHIP stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set (including a cover of Prince's "Nothing Compares 2U"), streaming on demand via MPR.DANNY FEDERICI, a keyboardist for Bruce Springsteen's E Street Band since it was formed in the early 1970s, died on Thursday. He was 58.  Anyone who knows me knows I love the Hammond B-3 organ, and Federici was the one serving it up on "Hungry Heart"', though he's almost as wailing in very different ways throughout songs from The River like "Jackson Cage"  and "Ramrod" without calling attention to himself.  And he is the chiming keyboard-driven glockenspiel on the Boss's signature "Born To Run." He will be missed.BILLY BRAGG talks to the Philly Inquirer about his new album and how he was influenced by Simon & Garfunkel and The Clash.ROBERT FORSTER:  The former Go-Between talks to The Australian about his first solo album in nearly 12 years, the first since the 2006 death of Go-Betweens co-founder Grant McLennan.  You can stream an advance track, "Pandanus," via YepRoc.MYSPACE is set to give the major labels better terms on ad revenue than the indie bands who built the social network into a music destination.  Meet the new boss.AMY WINEHOUSE has reportedly started making plans to end her marriage to Blake Fielder-Civil.  She was also caught toking up on video by the uber-reliable News of the World; record bosses have threatened to stop her from releasing any new material until she cleans up her act.RICK ASTLEY:  SurveyUSA estimates that at least 18 million Americans have now been "Rickrolled," according to a national poll of 959 adults, conducted 04/08/08.ROB LOWE:  Jessica Gibson, Lowe's former nanny who claims Robbie boy was playin' with himself and gropin' her, was secretly on the hunt for 1.5 million bucks from the actor; her boyfriend was also on the hunt for a cool mil to jump start his business, according to TMZ.  The lawyer representing the ex-nanny is demanding videotaped depositions of Lowe and his wife, according to E! News.WEEKEND BOX OFFICE:  The first time team up of Jet Li and Jackie Chan put The Forbidden Kingdom at the top with 20.8 million, followed fairly closely by the Judd Apatow/Jason Siegel comedy Forgetting Sarah Marshall with 17.3 million.  I saw the latter and enjoyed it -- not gut-bustingly funny, but Siegel captured the usual Apatow blend of raunchy and sweet.  Mila Kunis is adorable, but you knew that.  Prom Night tumbled to third, but is still way profitable.  Al Pacino's 88 Minutes managed to debut fourth, despite having been shelved for years.  Nim's Island rounds out the Top Five and comes close to breaking even.  21 drops from 3 to 6, but has made almost twice its 35 million budget.  Street Kings drops 68 percent, but almost breaks even on a skimpy 20 million budget.  Horton Hears a Who takes in another 3.5 million as it closes in on 150 million total,  The Ben Stein doc Expelled debuts in ninth, but I can't imagine there are more intelligent design fans left to go see it.  Leatherheads drops from fifth to tenth and has made less than half of its production budget.TOM-KAT UPDATE:  Gossip Girls has some kinda intrusive photos accompanying their inside look at the Tom-Kitten's 2nd birthday party.BRADGELINA are reportedly planning a secret summer wedding - and the event could lead to a reconciliation between Angelina and her estranged actor father Jon Voight, according to the Daily Mail.SANDRA BULLOCK & JESSE JAMES were hit by a drunk driver Friday night while riding in a private car in Gloucester, MA.  They said they were fine and didn't need medical attention. JESSICA SIMPSON's recent hospital stay was triggered by more than just an "infection," according to the ever-reliable Star magazine, which claims the pneumatic blonde was hospitalized after months of hard drinking with beau Tony Romo, and even asked for a pregnancy test.BRITNEY SPEARS returning to How I Met Your Mother, a source tells People magazine.GARY BUSEY has been evicted from his Malibu, California home for failing to pay his rent.MADONNA is finalizing negotiations to play a mega-bucks 2 date tour in Dubai, reports The Sun.CNN's RICHARD QUEST was busted in Central Park early Friday with some drugs in his pocket, a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot, law-enforcement sources said.DON'T HASSEL THE HOFF:  The long, messy split of Hasselhoff and Pamela Bach resulted finally in a dry, civil divorce settlement filed Thursday in a Los Angeles court.  The Baywatch and Knight Rider icon keeps the rights to the Hoffworld-branded trademarks to his nickname, "Hoff," and his catchphrase, "Don't Hassel the Hoff."  He seems to bag the best of what was known as his Encino, Calif., home's African room. He gets the African pipe, the ivory tusk, assorted statues and the "elephant foot and two elephant stools."  Bach gets the photographs of Hollywood great Claudette Colbert and pop singer Michael Jackson that hung outside the couple's master suite.  She gets the 2006 Mercedes; I presume he gets KITT.LIZ HURLEY just did a photo shoot for her new line of swimwear.  Call it Gratuitous Monday.VLADMIR PUTIN, President of Russia, reportedly has split with Ludmilla and is preparing to marry a 24-year-old, sensationally beautiful gymnast who seems quite flexible in the photos at the link.IRAQ: Iraqi soldiers swooped on the Basra stronghold of Shi'ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr on Saturday, saying they had seized control of his militia bastion where they suffered an embarrassing setback in late March.  CD shops sell love songs again. Some women emerge from their homes without veils, and alcohol sellers are coming out of hiding in the southern city of Basra - where religious vigilantes have long enforced strict Islamic codes.  The changes in recent weeks mark a surprising show of government sway - at least for now.  Trying to stem the infiltration of militia fighters, American forces have begun to build a massive concrete wall that will partition Sadr City, the densely populated Shiite neighborhood in the Iraqi capital.  In contrast to the cases of desertion during the first part of the battle for Basra, during fighting in Sadr City, two Iraqi T-72s and four other Iraqi armored vehicles arrived on the scene before US tanks were needed; the Iraqi Army also rushed ammunition to Sadr City, including machine-gun rounds and rocket-propelled grenades to give its units more firepower and address complaints of shortages.  Nevertheless, al-Sadr gave a "final warning" to the government Saturday to halt a US-Iraqi crackdown against his followers or he would declare "open war until liberation."  That has some worried in Najaf, but the L.A. Times also reports that the grand ayatollahs have declined to aid al-Sadr in Basra.MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, GOOD VIBRATIONS:  A cat with a theremin.  That cat is no Brian Wilson, but make sure to stay for the very end.CROCODILE BRAIN STOLEN in Zimbabwe. Police in Hwange are on the look out for a suspect who killed a crocodile and removed its brains amid revelations that it could be used for poisoining unsuspecting individuals.  I would be on the look out for a giant Frankencroc made up of the parts of recently killed crocodiles.VULTURES get no respect... no respect, I tell ya!THE SQUIRREL THREAT:  Armchair Generalist and CKR both report the fratricide of an ACORN recon agent.OH, SURE, IT STARTS SMALL: Scientists have been able to take control of flies' brains to make females behave just like males. Mon, 21 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=988 THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE:...with THE TURTLES!  First cracking the Top Ten in 1965 with their cover of Bob Dylan's "It Ain't Me, Babe."  they made the Top 30 later that year with the similar-sounding "Let Me Be," written by P.F. Sloan.  Their early 1966 hit, "You Baby," was written by P.F. Sloan and Steve Barri; you may recognize the voice introducing the sync of the band performing on the streets of L.A.  An album cut from the You Baby album, "Outside Chance," was co--written by Warren Zevon.  "Happy Together," rejected by countless performers, became both their biggest hit and their signature song, knocking the Beatles' "Penny Lane" from the No. 1 slot in the Spring of 1967.   The band appeared on the Mike Douglas show to play "Elenore" and the "House on the Hill."  "Elenore," with its unique use of the term et cetera, was a jab at their label for demanding more hits like "Happy Together," but went on to hit the Top ten anyway. For many years after the band dissolved, Howard Kaylan and Mark Volman went by the name Flo & Edde, because their contract barred from using the Turtles name or their own names.  The duo continued to record their own material, but were heard by most adding their trademark harmonies to hits like T. Rex's "Bang A Gong" and Bruce Springsteen's "Hungry Heart."COLIN MELOY, frontman for The Decemberists, is the guest DJ for the latest installment of All Songs Considered.FLEET FOXES may boast  '60s folk and antediluvian country influences, but singer-guitarist Robin Pecknold tells The A.V. Club they're not "neo-hippies."  There's a track from the upcoming Ragged Wood album streaming at the link.  The band also did the four free songs thing at Daytrotter.SHE & HIM:  Zooey Deschanel, actress-turned-indie darling, is profiled in the New York Times.WEEEZER is streaming a new song, "Pork & Beans," at their webiste.  Very Weezer.THE FIFTH BEATLE:  Most people forget that brief period when David Lee Roth fronted the Fabs. (slight profanity)NIGHTMARE OF YOU covers Cheap Trick's "Top of the World" at TheirSpace.  Jangly!ROGUE WAVE: Zach Rogue talks to DC's Express about dealing with the death of keyboardist Gram LeBron's father, drummer Pat Spurgeon's kidney transplant, his newfound fatherhood, the recruitment of a new bass player, Patrick Abernathy, and the death of former bassist Evan Farrell in a fire.  It also sounds like he might be suffering from eco-anxiety.RYAN ADAMS sets the record straight on some personal and professional rumors in highlights from his wacky blog excerpted at Stereogum.THE WORST NO. 1 SONGS OF THE '80'S, according to PopDose, with embedded video.CUTOUT BIN:  From GbV to JJ Jackson, from Iron & Wine to Sonny & Cher to Sam & Dave, with Queen (and covers) and a hunk o' Cheap Trick, this Friday's fortuitous finds can be jukeboxed or streamed individually on the Pate page at the ol' HMASHLEE SIMPSON is still dodging pregnancy rumors, but creepy dad-manager Joe is already trying to sell the baby pictures -- for a million dollars, when the tabloids are thinking more like 60 grand.NOW SHOWING: This weekend's wide releases include the Jackie Chan-Jet Li flick The Forbidden Kingdom, which is currently scoring 57 percent on the ol' Tomatometer; the Judd Apatow-Jason Siegel comedy Forgetting Sarah Marshall, which is scoring 83 percent, the Al Pacino thriller 88 minutes, scoring 10 percent; and the Ben Stein documentary Expelled, which is scoring 9 percent (albeit on only 11 reviews at the moment).BRITNEY SPEARS is in negotiations with Bally Total Fitness to be a frontwoman for the company.  Meanwhile, lawyers are collecting a big payday from the travails of the pop wreck.OPRAH WINFREY may have gone too far in exploiting and distributing the teachings of a questionable New Age writer, as life begins to imitate The Onion.DEATH & THE CITY:  Did Cynthia Nixon let a spoiler for the Sex & The City movie out of the bag?OLLIE JOHNSON, the last of the classic Disney animation team known as the Nine Old Men, has died at the age of 95.  Tons of tributes and links at CartoonBrew, including one from Brad Bird -- who put animated versions of Johnson and pal Frank Thomas in both The Iron Giant and The Incredibles.  Anyone who ever enjoyed Pinocchio, Thumper, Peter & the Wolf, Mr. Smee, Pongo and Perdita, Baloo the Bear, the dancing penguins in Mary Poppins (and many more ) owes a childhood debt to Ollie Johnson.EMMA WATSON, Hermione in the Harry Potter films, turned 18 on Tuesday, which grants her access to the 20 million bucks she's amassed making the wildly popular film series.  She has taken lessons in money management given by Coutts Bank, which also manages the millions of co-star Daniel Radcliffe... and Queen Elizabeth II.TILDA SWINTON (Michael Clayton, The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe) wants to be left for the birds when she dies - stretched out on a remote Scottish beach.SPOCKS SPEAK:  Leonard Nimoy and Zachary Quinto talk to TV Guide about the movie (within strict limits) and the Vulcan experience. ALSO: William Shatner says he never realized until after "Star Trek" ended how disliked he was by the rest of the cast.THE INCREDIBLE HULK:  Ed Norton writes that there is no dispute among him, Marvel and Universal... but refuses an interview with Entertainment Weekly.IRON MAN director John Favreau takes you on a video set visit at Yahoo! Movies.  Meanwhile, the Onion News Network has a piece on the wildly popular Iron Man trailer.TERROR in the UK: Muslim activist Abu Izzadeen has been found guilty of inciting acts of terrorism abroad and fundraising for terrorist purposes.  The principal charges against the eight arose from speeches at Regent's Park Mosque on November 9, 2004.  Six of the eight defendants in the case have now been found guilty of supporting terrorism in some form.THE STANS: Terrorists are still operating freely in Pakistan along the country's Afghanistan border, despite the US giving Pakistan more than 10.5 billion in military and economic aid, according to a government watchdog agency. The Government Accountability Office says in a report released Thursday that the US lacks a comprehensive plan to deal with the terrorist threat.IRAN:  Pres. Bush and British PM Gordon Brown jointly pledged to step up efforts to thwart Iran's nuclear enrichment program and work with European leaders to increase sanctions on the country during a press conference outside the White House on Thursday. Rep. Gary Ackerman (D-NY), chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Subcommittee on the Middle East and South Asia, thinks the administration is not doing enough: "Within the next two years, there is a real possibility that Iran will have the means to make an atomic bomb. The reason for this awful truth is that they wanted it more than we wanted to stop them."IRAQ will open at least six major oil and natural-gas fields for exploration and production in the first bidding for licenses since the US-led invasion in 2003. The main Sunni Muslim political bloc has agreed in principle to return to the Shiite-led government of Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki nearly nine months after quitting the Cabinet. Sadrist leaders asserted they refuse to hand over the-Mahdi Army's weapons to the Iraqi govt or dissolve it except if Shiite top clerics gave directives to do that (which they won't, as they don't see that as their job).  A  prominent govt official has asserted that "any member of the armed forces or security organs who rebels against his government and military authority will be punished."  It turns out to be harder to desert than one Iraqi Army captain thought. Michael J. Totten interviews Marine Capt. Quintin Jones, commanding officer at Outpost Delta in the city of Karmah, on working with the Sunni tribal authorities.  OSCAR the NAKED, DANCING COCKATOO:  Twelve years ago, he was given six months to live after developing a beak and feather disease.  Let's go to the video.  Oscar does a pretty mean Mick Jagger.HAMSTER KILLS MAN:  Richard Gere unavailable for comment.A SEVEN-FOOT FISH was landed by an Austrian schoolboy on his first ever fishing trip.  Pic at the link.A SIX-FOOT GATOR was found in the backseat of a car during a traffic stop near Angleton, TX; video at the link.  William Johnson has previously had a water moccasin snake in his car.GATOR THEFT FOILED: Surveillance video shows five college teens jumping a fence into a pond full of alligators in an attempt to steal one early Thursday morning from a Daytona Beach Shores mini-golf course.  oddly enough, the teens told police they hadn't thought far enough ahead to decide what they would do with an alligator. Fri, 18 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=986 ALEJANDRO ESCOVEDO has reached a deal to sign with Bruce Springsteen's management company, so it's probably no coincidence that he joined the Boss and the E Streeters in Houston for a live take on "Always A Friend," a track from Escovedo's upcoming Real Animal LP.RICHARD THOMPSON has canceled his April tour dates after he was bitten by a scorpion during a vacation in Mexico.HERE COMES SUMMER:  The weather is barely springlike where I am, but The A.V. Club has posted an A/V playlist of summery songs.IS IT BETTER TO BURN OUT THAN TO FADE AWAY?  Peter Lester tackles rock martyrdom at the Guardian music blog.PETER MOREN (of Peter Bjorn & John) does the four free songs thing for Daytrotter in support of his solo LP.BORN RUFFIANS are cooking on "I Need A life."  At least until the farm animals arrive.THE DARK ANGELS are streaming their new album, Directions to See a Ghost, via iMeem.  Kinda doom-and-gloomy; Kevin Penner would like it.DeVotchKa singer and multi-instrumentalist Nick Urata shuffles is iPod for the "Random Rules" feature at The A.V. Club.THE RACONTEURS:  Jack White and Brendan Benson talk about adjusting to a new band on Weekend Edition Sunday, streaming via NPR.SUB POP: The indie juggernaut is throwing itself quite a 20th birthday party.ROB LOWE: People magazine, which coincidentally has a photo shoot with Lowe's former nanny-turned- sex harrassment plaintiff, quotes her family describing her as caring, cautious and concerned about the actor's two sons.  In contrats, TMZ quotes sources connected to the case as saying the ex-nanny privately told folks there was mutual flirting going on between her and Rob, but she never mentioned sexual harassment.ASHLEE SIMPSON:  People magazine joins those claiming that Simpson is pregnant and plans to get married next month.  OK! magazine thinks it has spotted a baby bump.TOM-KAT UPDATE:  Crushed by the weight of her marriage to Cruise, Holmes is striking out on her own - and she's determined to take their daughter, Suri, with her to NYC, according the ever reliable Star magazine. JENNIE GARTH seems to be loading up the truck and moving to Beverly... (Hills that is, swimming pools, 90210 spinoffs.LINDSAY LOHAN wants to assume a missionary position, according to her ex-con dad. Meanwhile, Li-Lo is dissed by Rupert Grint?  Ouch!  MARILYN MONROE: Defamer has a trio of experts debunking the "sex tape hoax."GWYNETH PALTROW tells Vogue that she battled post-partum depression after welcoming her second child in 2006.CAMERON DIAZ has suddenly lost her dad to pneumonia.  He was only 58.DEBBIE GIBSON has filed for a restraining order against a Spanish man who runs a fan club and has allegedly followed her on concert tours and showed up at her door.NAOMI CAMPBELL, having been arrested at Heathrow and apparently banned from all British Airways flights, has annouced she is boycotting the airline.  The short-fused supermodel also claims that BA had changed its mind about banning her from its aircraft and was now desperate for her custom.  You can't fire her, she quits!MARILYN MANSON has almost finished turning his gf Evan Rachel Wood into his ex-wife, Dita Von Teese.PAKISTAN:  Pakistani security forces killed a senior Taliban commander who became a hero to Islamic militants for his role in shooting down a US helicopter in 2005, killing all 16 special forces troops aboard. A close aide of rebel cleric Mullah Fazlullah has offered to surrender on the condition that security forces and the government grant him amnesty from prosecution.IRAQ: The NYT's Michael Gordon reports on the desertion of a company of Iraqi soldiers from their outpost in Sadr City, while engaged with the enemy, which is a serious crime.  OTOH, the Iraqi and US military were able to replace unit on short notice, and it appears that Iraqi govt forces are dug in the area.  The Iraqi government is pumping 350 million into Basra, Mosul, and the Al Shula and Sadr City neighborhoods in Baghdad, in an effort to stem violence by producing jobs and reinvigorating social programs.  The aim now is to launch an ambitious plan of 30-day, 60-day, and 90-day public works and services-improvement projects designed to convince the local population that the Iraqi government - and not Sadr's Mahdi Army militia - is best able to improve the quality of life.  MNF-Iraq kicked off the main phase of its first major operation devoted primarily to capacity building - expanding governance, economics and infrastructure - April 15 in communities south of Baghdad in the Baghdad Province.  Iraq's government removed the top military and police commanders in Basra on Wednesday; they were widely respected by US and British military leaders -- which suggests that Prime Minister al-Maliki is scapegoating them for his rush into fighting the Mahdi Army in Basra, which was a PR disaster, though more successful than the early media coverage suggested.GIN the BORDER COLLIE gots talent.  Even Simon Cowell thinks so.PAW PAW, Martha Stewart's 60-lb chow, has died of renal failure; he was almost 12.ORANGUTAN HABITAT is disappearing -- and Girl Scout cookies are to blame.ROAMING LION found in a Romanian garden.PYGMY HEDGEHOGS are the hottest pet in the UK.  Awww...some pics at the link. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 00:00:00 -0700 http://www.claudepate.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=985 DAVID BYRNE covers "You Can Call Me Al" and "I Know What I Know" during Paul Simon's week-long residency at the Brooklyn Academy of Music.AUSTIN CITY LIMITS FEST has announced its lineup, including Foo Fighters, Robert Plant & Alison Krauss, Beck, John Fogerty, David Byrne, The Raconteurs, Gnarls Barkley, Conor Oberst And The Mystic Valley Band, Erykah Badu, Robert Earl Keen, Patty Griffin, Tegan & Sara, Okkervil River, Sharon Jones And The Dap Kings, Hot Chip, Vampire Weekend, Duffy, Alejandro Escovedo, Roky Erikson and many, many more...ISLANDS have leaked two tracks from their upcoming Arm's Way album, "The Arm" and "Creeper."  Word is that another track, "In The Rushes," icorporates the band's take on The Who's "A Quick One (While He's Away)."  BONUS:  Islands has also been known to tackle The Kinks' "Waterloo Sunset."THE SPRING PREVIEW at Rolling Stone is comprehensively comprehensive, with streaming audio clips. 65 screens.SPOON frontman Britt Daniel chatted with Pitchfork about a Spoon-related internet rumor, "Arrested Development", Har Mar Superstar vs. the White Stripes, Feist's "My Moon My Man", and why Merge's Mac McCaughan should run for office.COLIN MELOY opens an in-store gig at Jackpot Records with "We Both Go Down Together."THE BLAKES, known for their whiskey-tinged guitar riffs,