RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES: NY Gov. Eliot Spitzer, a/k/a "Client 9," who investigated radio airplay and payola while serving as the state's Attorney General, totally gave me earworm yesterday for Labelle's "Lady Marmalade."  And The Police's "Roxanne."  That's yer first Twofer Tuesday.

NEW RELEASES:  Cassettes Won't Listen, Kaki King, Why?, Black Hollies and more are streaming in full this week from Spinner.

ROBYN HITCHCOCK & ANDY PARTRIDGE are collaborating on a possible album, one of many projects Hitchcock has in the works, according to Billboard.

GRIZZLY BEAR:  You can stream a new song the band debuted on KCRW, "While You Wait for the Others," via YANP.  The reverb on this take gives it a bit of a 60s vibe, methinks.

R.E.M. will debut Accelerate, its newest album, via music site/Facebook app iLike starting March 24th. Warners won't start selling the album till April 1.

VAMPIRE WEEKEND played "A-Punk" and "M79" on the Peacock Saturday, with an assist on the latter from a string section.  That makes a Twofer of Twofers.

STEVE WYNN answers 20 questions for PopMatters, nicely navigating the dreaded "Star Wars vs. Star Trek" question.

BASIA BULAT does the four free songs thing for Daytrotter, including two unreleased originals and a cover of Sam Cooke's "The Hem Of His Garment."

THE ACORN:  Rolf Klausener and Jeff Debutte warm up for SxSW in an interview at MOKB, which includes Dodge asking about Canadian football.  Two streaming tracks also.

WILCO:  In an interview with The Australian, Jeff Tweedy makes clear there is a bit of friction with Billy Bragg, with whom the band recorded Mermaid Avenue and Mermaid Avenue II: "Nothing against Billy. He's just full of sh-t.  That's just what he's built his whole life on, so that's all right."  Me-OW!

BRITNEY SPEARS and her Fed-Ex are battling over a million dollars in legal fees from their child custody case as an official let stand a court order that has denied her custody and limited visits with their two sons.  On the upside, TMZ has learned that the pop wreck is prepping for a small guest part on CBS's hit "How I Met Your Mother."  And Spears has been granted a $1500 weekly allowance by the L.A. Superior court.

HEATHER LOCKLEAR:  The suicide call that turned out to be a false alarm may have been placed by Locklear's psychiatrist.

SIENNA MILLER reportedly has agreed to marry lover Rhys Ifans... at the third time of asking.

GEORGE CLOONEY, otoh, is denying a report that he is secretly engaged to former Fear Factor winner Sarah Larson.

COURTNEY LOVE:  According to The Sun, the rocker went to the LAPD to report to claim that identity thieves used Kurt Cobain's social security number to buy a $3.2 million house and also set up 188 credit cards in her name.  But sources tell TMZ Courtney is simply (and possibly medically) delusional.

TOM-KAT UPDATE:  Ex-Scientologist Marc Headley - who used to produce promotional films for the controversial religion - tells the uber-reliable News of the World that Cruise landed Holmes after a series of casting calls for actresses to fill the girlfriend role.  "First they rounded up Scientologist actresses like Erica Christensen, Erica Howard and Sofia Milos.. But they were all rejected... Then... they went for Jennifer Garner, Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Alba, in that order."  Garner and Alba didn't bite; Scar-Jo showed, but fled when she discovered the "audition" was at the Scientology Center in Hollywood.

HELENA CHRISTENSEN & JOSH HARTNETT are dunzo.  It was not my fault; they had issues.

UN-BOURNE?  Matt Damon and Paul Greengrass are tamping down last week's Variety story about a fourth installment in the Bourne franchise.

WOODY HARRELSON was reportedly none too pleased to be asked whether the cast of "Semi-Pro" if they got a contact high while working with him.

INDIANA JONES:  The adventuring archeologist's biggest stunt to date may be rescuing this summer box office.  Meanwhile, the new issue of Entertainment Weekly has semi-spoilers.

JESSICA SIMPSON manages to get some bad -- possibly unfair -- press on her trip to Kuwait - where she's performing for troops as part of Operation MySpace.

TERROR in the UK:  A man who knew some of the 7 July bombers has pleaded guilty to possessing an al-Qaeda training guide.  Judge James Stewart QC said he would face a maximum sentence of two years.

AFGHANISTAN:  Thousands of Afghan students chanted "Long live al Qaeda," during a protest aimed at Denmark and the Netherlands. Protesters accused the two European countries of insults against Islam.  Sunday's protest was in Jalalabad, where Osama Bin Laden made his last public appearance in late 2001.  Meanwhile, the Dutch government wants to boost development in Afghanistan as essential to ensure progress towards peace.  BONUS:  A British soldier soldier who almost single-handedly took on 150 Taliban after he and his 50-man convoy were ambushed in Afghanistan has been awarded the Military Cross: "They started it. We were going to finish it."

IRAQ:  Bill Roggio looks at an Iraqi Army operation to search for kidnappers in Mosul.  Michael Yon's latest dispatch is also from Mosul and involves Guitar Hero and a Predator drone.  MEMRI's translation of the Qatari daily Al-'Arab's interview with AQI commander in northern Iraq suggests AQ is on the ropes.  However, AQI may be shifting tactics back to the big, headline grabbing attacks in Iraq that helped plunge the country into chaos, a senior US commander said Monday.  Michael J. Totten blogs from Al Farris, which was part of Saddam's attempt to launch Iraq into the sci-fi future before he ruined his country with four wars, two genocides, and an international sanctions regime.

HUNDREDS OF DOGS, many dressed as babies or clowns, were taken to celebrate mass in Masaya, Nicaragua on Sunday, an annual ritual where the owners pray for their pets to be cured or avoid falling ill.

A WOMAN determined not to let her kitten become the second victim of a hungry python broke her wrist and was bitten twice as she fought off the large snake.

WILD ELEPHANTS disrupted an election in eastern Sri Lanka.

A BOULDER, CO SALON OWNER has been ticketed for dyeing her miniature poodle pink - and the woman said she plans to fight back.  Cici is a "breast-cancer awareness dog" that's been showing off her pink coat for three years at Zing Salon.  Pic and video at the link.