MORNING BECOMES ECLECTIC: Wednesday's show will feature Stars, whose latest disc was well-reviewed o­n the Pitchfork. o­n Thursday, Kathleen Edwards is featured. If the show does not air o­n your local NPR station, you can always get it by streaming media or podcast from KCRW (thanks to Sylvia Hauser for the tip).

ROXY MUSIC REUNITES for a new album, including Brian Eno, who left the band in 1973.

ELVIS COSTELLO was interviewed at SXSW.

MERLE HAGGARD was interviewed by Billboard.

FIONA APPLE is emerging from the "Where are they now?" file through file-sharing, because Sony is refusing to sell her shelved album. You can also stream it via Scenestars.

CATS AND DOGS should be brushing their teeth regularly. ALSO: Another Carnival of the Cats. Zippy the pit bull has broken out of death row. And a Belgian loves dogs in an unnatural way.

TOASTED CHEESE SANDWICHES go gourmet in London.

I WANT MY HDTV: High-definition television makes some celebs look better, others not so much.

THE INCREDIBLES: Reviewed as only Jeff Goldstein can.

GENE WILDER: Newsweek has an interview and excerpts from his forthcoming memoir.

CULT OF THE iPod: The gadget has been banned by a Sydney private school because they lead to "social isolation". The New York Daily News does a "person o­n the street" piece asking Podpeople, "What are you listenting to?"

NEW ORDER: The forthcoming Waiting for the Siren's Call is now streaming from overseas.

PAULA ABDUL: Prosecutors are considering whether to file criminal charges against the alleged singer for an alleged hit-and-run freeway accident last December, officials said Thursday. Straight up?

CBGB: Among the efforts to save the landmark New York punk venue is a collection of limited-edition treats from Gotham candy store Chocolate Bar. There is a toll-free number in the linked story, which also mentions the store's website (but there is no listing for the treats at the site yet).

JOURNALISTIC ETHICS: Mickey Kaus (formerly of The New Republic and now with Slate) asks, "How is the American Prospect different from Armstrong Williams?" There is a difference insofar as Williams was paid by the government, but from the standpoint of the payee, Kaus may have a point.

SIN CITY: A ton of advance reviews are up at Ain't-It-Cool News, almost all raves. There's a separate review from AICN semi-regular Neill Cumpston, who has a style all is own, and not a particularly family-friendly o­ne at that.

GIVE NUKES A CHANCE? Kenneth N. Waltz, perhaps the leading living theorist of the foreign policy realists, thinks we should stop worrying and learn to love the Bomb.

IRAQ: You have to love Agence France-Presse. A March 21st story lede: "At least 45 people have been killed in insurgent attacks across Iraq as Washington defended its decision to go to war o­n the second anniversary of the US-led invasion." The next sentence: "Twenty-four Iraqi insurgents were killed and six coalition soldiers wounded in a firefight in a Baghdad suburb overnight..." Does that math work for the insurgents? ALSO: In The New York Times, John Burns reports there have been signs that the tide may be shifting in favor of the U.S. along Haifa Street in Baghdad (a/k/a "Purple Heart Boulevard"). Time magazine reports on the growing professionalism of The Iraqi Special Forces Brigade.

KYRGYZSTAN: There is more heavy unrest over the parliamentary elections. President Askar Akayev o­n Monday ordered the Central Election Commission and Supreme Court to investigate alleged election violations and agreed to talk with the protesters.

SHAWN COLVIN, LORRAINE BRACCO, TERRY BRADSHAW and other celebrities are inking deals with drug companies to talk about their depression.

FEYNMAN LECTURES can be found here in both pdf and MP3 formats, for all you science geeks.

PAUL WOLFOWITZ AND BONO discussed World Bank issues last week. Wonkette can only imagine what that sounded like.

THE STATE OF ADVERTISING: The more things change, the more they stay the same?

PLAYGIRL EDITOR stripped of her duties after she revealed how she voted Republican in the 2004 election.

NEXT STOP, JURASSIC PARK: Scientists hope to clone a Woolly Mammoth with a body recovered from the Siberian tundra.

DO COMPUTERS HELP EDUCATE KIDS? "The less pupils use computers at school and at home, the better they do in international tests of literacy and maths, the largest study of its kind says," according to the London Telegraph.

TURTLE survives a fire, but its shell now bears the image of a devil's head.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO EXPLAIN COKE AND PEPSI TO THE ASSOCIATED PRESS, but apparently I do. The Associated Press reports that the Coca-Cola Co. will launch a no-calorie version of its trademark soft drink called Coca-Cola Zero in the United States in June. The drink will be sweetened partly with a blend of aspartame and acesulfame potassium.

The AP then reports "Purchase, N.Y.-based PepsiCo Inc. also has several different varieties of Pepsi and Diet Pepsi, including a one-calorie cola called Pepsi One, which is sweetened with Splenda." This is flat wrong. Splenda is made from sucralose, a modified version of sugar. Pepsi One is not sweetened with sucralose, as a glance at a bottle or can will reveal. Indeed, Pepsi One is sweetened with a blend of aspartame and acesulfame potassium, just like the new Coca-Cola Zero will be, assuming the AP got that right. The AP adds that Pepsi "Spokesman Dave DeCecco said Pepsi does not have any current plans for a zero-calorie version of Pepsi." Of course not; Pepsico already has Diet Pepsi and Pepsi One. Next time, the AP might have its reporter read a pop can, or ask someone to explain it to them.

WRAPPED DETECTIVE: The DJ who brought you "Paperback Believer" now delivers a monster mash-up of Elvis Costello, The Police, Lionel Richie, Peggy Lee, Bob Marley, The Hollies and Led Zeppelin.

BRENDON BENSON is profiled by the Detroit Free Press. Unsurprisingly, he had problems with his label. Check the Benson links I posted Friday if you missed them.

STEVE WYNN: Pitchfork has a review of his post-Dream Syndicate retrospective, the wonderfully titled, What I Did After My Band Broke Up.

FREEBIRD! The Wall Street Journal (by way of the Naples Daily News) tries to clear Chicago as the source of rock's oldest joke.

"I AM A GOLDEN GOD!" Jim DeRogatis recaps Robert Plant's keynote at SXSW. To his credit, Plant paid his respect to Pinetop Perkins.

SEX JUST ISN'T A BIG DEAL ANYMORE: The Chicago Sun-Times kicked off a series with this headline o­n Friday. Of course, if it was true, it would be news, but would not be a page one headline. Rather, sex still sells, so there it is, a series on sex in college replete with sentences like, "Jeans hang precariously below shiny belly rings winking from firm, flat midriffs." Moreover, a glossary provided as a sidebar to the story describes a return home the morning after as the "stride of pride" or the "walk of shame," depending o­n whether a male or female is doing the walking [ though I admit the term "Cincinnati Bengal" is a funny twist o­n a familiar concept.] So it would appear that college has not turned into a judgment-free zone. Indeed, it would appear that college hasn't changed much since Claude Pate was an active band, given that Part Two of the series examines group dating. SEMI-RELATED: The dark underbelly of Spring Break.

DIRTY CHEERING: Legislation filed by Texas State Rep. Al Edwards would put an end to "sexually suggestive" performances at athletic events and other extracurricular competitions.

MEN AND WOMEN: Two new studies suggest that the female "inactive" X chromosome may eventually explain some of the behavioural and biological differences between individual women, and perhaps, between women and men. Clearly, Bill Gates should be working o­n new components.

JUST IN TIME FOR EASTER: Candles that smell like Jesus.

LARRY SUMMERS UPDATE: The Faculty of Arts and Sciences voted that they lack confidence in the Harvard president. Now they don't know what will happen and it is slowing university business. That's a little tardy with those thinking caps, professors.

WARD CHURCHILL UPDATE: The University of Colorado professor whose book blaming the U.S. for 9/11 is titled, On the Justice of Roosting Chickens is finding out for whom the bell tolls.

ERNESTO ALMONTE manages to recall both Hannibal Lechter and Lorena Bobbitt.

ROCK FOR KIDS: The Associated Press notices rockers making albums for kids. But aside from They Might Be Giants and former Del Fuego Dan Zanes, it's mostly the rock equivalent of movie stars doing voices for animated flicks.

TOM WAITS makes a Top 20 Favorite Albums list for The Observer.

BECK: Sasha Frere-Jones writes that Guero "sums up everything Beck is good at, like an imaginary greatest-hits album."

ADAM DURITZ: The Counting Crows singer and Sideshow Bob lookalike was hitting o­n Mary-Kate Olsen. He should be more careful; he could have snapped her like a toothpick.

JACKO JUSTICE: Simpsons co-creator Sam Simon told Howard Stern Thursday that when Michael Jackson was a guest star o­n the animated series, he demanded the script be changed so his character could spend more time with Bart.

NO CLOTHES FOR XTINA: Christina Aguilera's multi-million contract to start a fashion line was terminated after she called celebrity lines "tacky."

CULT OF THE iPod: Not everyone is joining.

BLOGGERS AS JOURNALISTS: The St. Louis Post-Dispatch and the Rocky Mountain News come out in favor of granting bloggers the same privileges as journalists. Now if they figure out that this means everyone should have the same rights...

IRAQ: The top Marine officer in Iraq said Friday that the number of attacks against American troops in Sunni-dominated western Iraq and death tolls had dropped sharply over the last four months, according to The New York Times.

KYGYZSTAN: Protests over the parliamentary elections spread, in some cases erupting into riots. The interior department building in Jalal-Abad has been practically burned down. The government said it was ready to negotiate with the protesters who have demanded President Askar Akayev's resignation.

CANADIAN HEALTH CARE: A letter from the Moncton Hospital to a New Brunswick heart patient in need of an electrocardiogram said the appointment would be in three months. It added: "If the person named o­n this computer-generated letter is deceased, please accept our sincere apologies."

PETE DOHERTY UPDATE: How's the rehab going for the troubled singer? On St. Patrick's Day, he was joined o­n stage by former Pogues frontman Shane MacGowan. According to the New York Post's Page Six, "the two Guinness-swilling hellraisers sang incoherently together for 10 minutes, according to a witness, before McGowan stumbled offstage." Doherty galpal-fiancee-whatever Kate Moss fought with bouncers at the bar. And Doherty is inexplicably teaming up with Ocean Colour Scene. Well, maybe not inexplicable, just bizzare.

LOST IN TRANSLATION: The Killers' Japanese hotel hijinx were interrupted by ex-Secretary of State James A. Baker III.

THE "WHERE ARE THEY NOW?" FILE: The London Sunday Times covers Teenage Fanclub as they go indie to release their first disc in five years.