THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE...

with MALCOLM McLAREN! The svengali behind the Sex Pistols (after a stint promoting the New York Dolls), the Burundi drumming sound of post punk (e.g., Adam Ant and Bow Wow Wow Wow), and the hit "Buffalo Girls,"  died at 64 after a long bout with cancer. Obviously, the Pistols' "God Save the Queen," "Holidays in the Sun," and "Anarchy in the UK" are the order of the day, along with Bow Wow Wow's remake of the Strangeloves hit "I Want Candy." NME collects statements from John Lydon (Johnny Rotten), NY Doll Sylvain Sylvain, ex-partner Vivienne Westwood, Boy George, Echo and the Bunnymen and more.

BEACH HOUSE stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set streaming via MPR.

CITIZEN COPE stopped by Morning Becomes Eclectic for a chat and mini-set streaming via KCRW.

FLORENCE and the MACHINE gets a feature on All Things Considered, with a link to an unplugged set for WFUV.

KILL ROCK STARS has a free 21-song sampler for download, including tracks from the Decemberists, Bikini Kill, Elliot Smith, Sleater-Kinney, Horse Feathers and more...

KEITH RICHARDS, LORD of the UNDEAD: Captain's Dead offers the complete "Honeymoon Tapes" to stream and download.

CURSIVE attacks Starship's "We Built This City" for The A.V. Club Undercover. Awesome use of the Omnichord and melodica, dudes.

SUPERCHUNK: Mac McCaughan talks to Spinner about the bands upcoming LP -- its first since 2001.

LAURA MARLING talks to the NYT's T Magazine about her new LP, growing up, reading lists, her childhood soundtrack, etc.

MOUNTAIN GOATS: John Darnielle talks to Under the Radar about prose, the liturgical function of music, and people on the fringe. (Thx, LHB.)

M.I.A. talks to NME about Lady GaGa, Sleigh Bells, the punk ethos and more...

CUTOUT BIN: From Adam and the Ants to Kenny Rogers and the First Edition, from the Clash to Dee Dee Warwick, from the Juliana Hatfield Three to Jack Nitzsche, from Magazine to Norman Greenbaum, plus the Sex Pistols (natch), Duane Eddy, the Three O'Clock, Ted Leo and more -- is streaming from the Pate page at the ol' HM.

NOW SHOWING: This weekend's wide release finds Steve Carell and Tina Fey in Date Night, which is currently scoring 60 percent on the ol' Tomatometer.  Opening near-wide is Letters to God, a Christian-themed drama not widely screened for critics.

SANDRA BULLOCK and JESSE JAMES: He's denying that he's in at least a dozen sex tapes with other women featuring Nazi-themed paraphernalia. RadarOnline claims James spent several hundred thousand dollars on his various mistresses.

TIGER WOODS: Scolded from the grave to prop up his merch empire. Because Earl was a shining example.

DEMI MOORE now admits she had an "extreme obsession" with her body, yet still manages to be miffed that people speculate over how much she spent on plastic surgery.

NICOLAS CAGE: What if you had to auction off your swank properties... and no one was interested?

KATE GOSSELIN will once again be inflicted on the North American TV audience.

PIXELS: An 8-bit attack.

KYRGZSTAN: The president of Kyrgyzstan was forced to flee the capital, Bishkek, on Wednesday after bloody protests erupted across the country over his repressive rule, a backlash that could pose a threat to the American military supply line into nearby Afghanistan.

PAKISTAN: The parliament voted unanimously in favor of measures which limit key presidential powers.

IRAQ: The Iraqi political group of radical Shia cleric Moqtada Sadr has rejected both of the front-running candidates for prime minister. The Sadrist bloc of 40 parliamentary seats could have swung the decision for either Allawi or Maliki.

A GOLDFISH is trained to play fetch.

SOME BIRDS have more influence than others when it comes to controlling a flock's soaring flight, according to a new study of homing pigeons that wore little backpacks equipped with GPS devices.

CHICKEN ON THE LAM meets a violent end in Lower Merion Township, PA.

A NEWLY-DISCOVERED LIZARD is very manly.

A SAVAGE PREDATOR known as "Fishzilla" and a perch capable of climbing trees could soon reach the far north of Queensland.

AN ORPHANED OWL raised by humans is scared of heights?

DR. DOG play "Stranger" for Fallon.

CARIBOU is advance streaming Swim. (Thx, Chromewaves.)

THE VIVIAN GIRLS were guests on this week's edition of Sound Opinions.

QUASI is profiled by All Things Considered.

THE STRANGE BOYS get a Twofer on the World Cafe.

THE FUGS get a feature plus tracks from All Things Considered.

MONSTERS OF FOLK: "Dear God."

LOU REED talks to The Quietus about Metal Machine Music, and not about various other topics.

NEIL YOUNG and JONATHAN DEMME Skype about the Neil Young Trunk Show.

SPOON: Britt Daniel talks to Reverb about Starbucks, religion and the Drudge Report. (Thx, LHB.)

ANDREW W.K.: "It's time to let you hear the song which earned me a juvenile restraining order."

TIGER WOODS slept with his neighbor's 21-year-old daughter, according to the new issue of the National Enquirer.

LINDSAY LOHAN wants to vomit over the engagement of her ex-con Dad to Kate Major, the former reporter who was previously romantically linked to Jon Gosselin.

TIKI BARBER: The football star-turned-"Today" show-correspondent dumped his 8-months-pregnant wife for a sexy former NBC intern, according to the NYP.

JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT says she has been cheated on "a lot."

CONAN O'BRIEN has learned to embrace the Internet after losing his Tonight Show gig.

MARTINA NAVRATILOVA has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She believes she will make a full recovery.

AFGHANISTAN: The White House offered fresh signals of its displeasure with Pres. Karzai, hinting that it might cancel his Washington meeting with President Obama next month.

IRAQ: The US Army is now 35 percent complete in its effort to move equipment and materiel out as part of the withdrawal; the process -- and repair and redeployment of materiel to Afghanistan -- is running ahead of shedule. 

STANDING CAT: Let's go to the video.

A MACAQUE MONKEY has been recruited by police to "man" a checkpoint in southern Thailand.

AN "ORIENTAL YETI" has baffled scientists after emerging from ancient woodlands in remote central China.

A SERVICE DOG is ineligible for food stamps, a Pennsylvania appeals court ruled Tuesday.

LISSIE covers Lady GaGa's "Bad Romance."

SPOON stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set.

TITUS ANDRONICUS also stopped by The Current for a chat and mini-set.

JAKOB DYLAN did a Tiny Desk Concert visited Studio 4A at NPR.

FREEDY JOHNSTON did the four free songs thing for Daytrotter, including one of my faves of his, "Bad Reputation" (which is not the Joan Jett number).

STARS drops "Fixed" as an advance track for The Five Ghosts.

SHE & HIM play "Thieves" for Kimmel. Another late night, another bit of Zooey having a deer in the headlights moment for no reason.

THE SPECIALS (minus Jerry Dammers) are coming back to the US for the first time since 1981: "All I wanted to do was rekindle our friendships, because we spent such a long period together and an intense period, and then it disappeared," Terry Hall said later of the long-estranged band's reunion, which was spurred, in part, by his suicide attempt in 2004.

ELVIS PRESLEY: Did the mainstream media's overwrought coverage crown Elvis as the King, instead of a Gene Vincent or Eddie Cochran?

THURSTON MOORE will teach Avant Garde Preschool in NYC.  Kids must be aged 8-12.

ROBERT POLLARD, Hall of Famer?

SANDRA BULLOCK and JESSE JAMES: Bullock broke her silence during her marriage crisis, denying an Internet report there's a sex tape with her and husband Jesse James. RadarOnline claims James has more than 12 homemade sex tapes... with other women, and that Bullock has yet to file divorce papers because she's worried her angry husband will spill her secrets.

NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN has sued Marc Cherry, the creator of "Desperate Housewives," alleging he struck her across the head and face on the set, and after she complained he fired her.

GEORGE CLOONEY denies breakup rumors.

JIM CARREY & JENNY McCARTHY: Dunzo, after a five-year relationship.

LINDSAY LOHAN can now barely make ends meet.

HEIDI MONTAG cannot jog anymore, because of the 10 plastic surgeries.

MADONNA broke ground at the girls' school she's financing in Malawi.

DENNIS HOPPER will be paying 12K monthly to his estranged wife, whom he accused of tyring to kill him.

IRAN: Michael J. Totten interviews "Reza Kahlili," who was a member of Khomeini's Revolutionary Guards -- and a CIA agent. Iran's foreign spokesman said that Tehran is ready to renew negotiations... but he says the discussion about Iran's nuclear program is a "closed case."

AFGHANISTAN: Why Karzai Is Pushing Back Against the US.

IRAQ: The Baghdad area was hit with the third major attack in four days as bombs were detonated in residential areas of the capital, killing 35 Iraqis and wounding scores more.  While no group has taken responsibility for the attacks, al Qaeda in Iraq has conducted similar attacks in the past in an attempt to stoke sectarian violence between minority Sunnis and majority Shia.

TUXEDO KITTEH: Let's go to the video.

WHEN WOMBATS ATTACK: A Black Saturday bushfire survivor is recovering in hospital after he was attacked by a wombat outside his caravan north-east of Melbourne today.

DARIUS is the new World's Largest Bunny.

RENEGADE COWS on the block.

SHE & HIM play "In The Sun" late at nght in NYC. Zooey tends to starehere, suggesting she's not in a tour groove yet, though she sounds fine.

NEW RELEASES: Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings, Jakob Dylan (and guests), Dr. Dog, Harlem, Jonsi,  Laura Marling, Matt Pond PA, Solomon Burke, Love is All and more are streaming this week via Spinner.

THE NELS CLINE SINGERS are advance streaming Initiate via NPR.

JEFF BECK is advance streaming Emotion and Commotion via NPR.

AU REVOIR SIMONE did the four free songs thing for Daytrotter again.

THE THERMALS have a new track, "Separate," streaming at the moment.

THE HOLD STEADY dropped an advance track called "The Weekenders" on the MTV.

ROBYN HITCHCOCK and the VENUS 3 release Propellor Time tomorrow -- and while I didn't find a (legit) stream of the album, we do have an interview and a video for "Ordinary Millionaire," a track with music (and some guitar) from Johnny Marr. Add a classic free-associating Robyn on late night TV playing "Lost Madonna of the Wasps" and you have Twofer Tuesday.

R.E.M.: Happy Belated 30th Birthday!

THE NATIONAL: Matt Berninger and Aaron Dessner talk to The Quietus about in-studio strife, making a scrappier record than Boxer, and "summer lovin' torture parties" in decrepit Grey Gardens-style mansions.

GANG OF FOUR is self financing their next album, so if you would like vials of their blood, they want to hear from you.

BOB DYLAN: Banned from playing in China. The times, they aren't a-changin'.

KEITH RICHARDS, LORD OF THE UNDEAD, reveals a deep, dark secret to the Times of London.

SANDRA BULLOCK and JESSE JAMES: radarOnline has been all over their story, claiming that Bullock has prepared divorce papers, their prenup specifies he gets no money in a divorce if he cheats during the marriage, and that James bolted from rehab after Bullock refused to take his phone call.

TIGER WOODS is reportedly employing a virtual army of approx. 90 private bodyguards -- including former FBI and Secret Service agents -- to protect the golfer at The Masters, where he did the obligatory presser Monday..

BRADGELINA visited Bosnia on Monday, spotlighting the plight of 117K people who have not able to return to their homes, even 15 years after the end of the war.

GWYNETH PALTROW tells Vogue she can be a vengeful, angry woman. Shocka!

CHLOE MORETZ, coming to big screens soon in Kick-A$$, is also starring in an American version of the acclaimed Swedish vampire flick, Let the Right One In.

CAMERON CROWE is still struggling to make a Marvin Gaye biopic.

IRON MAN 2 has posted a two-minute clip of the big entrance at Stark Expo.

IRAN: An Iranian nuclear scientist who defected to the US after disappearing in Saudi Arabia last year said the CIA's efforts to disrupt the program have showed progress. The current sanctions regime have had no impact on Iran's bottom line.

AFGHANISTAN: Pres. Karzai attacked the West for its involvement in Afghanistan and threatened to join the Taliban.

IRAQ: Forty-one Iraqis were killed and more than 250 were wounded in a triple suicide attack that targeted the Egyptian, Iranian, and German embassies in Baghdad -- but no foreign embassy personnel were reported killed. Kinda like Khan, they keep missing the target.

DOG and DEER, playing together... Mass hysteria!

SHEEP vs ALIENS: Who you got?

SALAMANDERS are getting a 150K, taxpayer-funded crossing in Monkton, VT. Apparently, the recession is way over in Vermont.

PANTS FOR DOGS: The horror. Ther's a reason why this is usually only seen in cartoons.

THREE SHARKS and an OCTOPUS found... in Tennessee. Paging Davy Crockett or Jacques Cousteau?

I'M TAKING A SICK DAY, but hope to return tomorrow with all the usual tripe.  To tide you over, a few showbiz items:

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE: Clash of the Titans takes the top spot with 61 million.  That's the best Easter weekend opening ever. And had it not been for Easter Sunday, it might well have been the best April opening ever (that title remains with the last Fast & Furious movie, at 71 million).  Why Did I Get Married Too took in 30.2 million, which almost certainly makes it instantly profitable, given that Tyler Perry pics generally cost about 20 million. How to Train Your Dragon made 29.2 million -- its 33 percent drop has to be considered good, given the 3-D encroachment from Titans and the Easter Sunday. The Last Song made 16.2 million (25.6 million since opening last Wednesday); Miley and a low budget save this from failure. Alice in Wonderland rounds out the Top Five; its 53 percent drop was largely expected -- but shed no tears for 672.8 million in receipts worldwide.

SANDRA BULLOCK and JESSE JAMES: A moving van was seen in front of Jesse James' Seal Beach, Calif. home on Friday -- nearly three weeks after Sandra Bullock is said to have moved out.

BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN: the NYP has the lurid (and denied) allegations of the Boss having an affair with a married Jersey Girl.

JOHN FORSYTHE, the debonair actor whose matinee-idol looks, confident charm and mellifluous voice helped make him the star of three hit television series, including ABC's "Charlie's Angel's" and "Dynasty," died last Thursday at his home in Santa Ynez, Calif. He was 92.